Rogue (Anna Marie) (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
southernchere) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
expiationlogs2024-08-02 12:59 am
southernchere) wrote in expiationlogs2024-08-02 12:59 am
★ AUG. (CATCH ALL); & when time at last consumes me, Broken & unholy。
Who: rogue & co. / jinx & co.
Where: all over aldrip
What: an august catch-all log for both of my characters.
Warnings: JINX: suffers from mental illness. such as the following - schizophrenia, hallucinations, PTSD, separation anxiety, & dissociation. these illnesses may or may not happen in this log. JINX'S BIO, PERMS, & OP-OUT: HERE.
Where: all over aldrip
What: an august catch-all log for both of my characters.
Warnings: JINX: suffers from mental illness. such as the following - schizophrenia, hallucinations, PTSD, separation anxiety, & dissociation. these illnesses may or may not happen in this log. JINX'S BIO, PERMS, & OP-OUT: HERE.
ROGUE TOP-LEVEL DIRECTORY
⨂ — NOURISH YOUR SOUL DINING ● OPEN
⨂ —
⨂ —
JINX TOP-LEVEL DIRECTORY
💥 — THE LAST DROP ● OPEN
💥— BAR LUPIN ● OPEN
💥 — TIMEBOMB ● PRIVATE
💥 — SILLY GLITCH HIJINKS ● OPEN
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[ saying that is still extremely painful to say, but it's his words that help her push forward and her head up high for the last month or so. if only he was still alive to sprout out more irritating cajun wisdom on her. ]
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And hey, it's not all bad. We kept a meteor from hitting Earth, and that's got to count for something. Well - you guys did. Call me moral support.
[Morph's powers just weren't any help in that particular scenario, and besides, someone had to keep an eye on Logan. There wasn't anywhere else they would've wanted to be in that moment. They at least got a chance to say something, just in case the team perished in the attempt. Morph is still pretty sure no one died, even if how they and Rogue had ended up here was completely mysterious.]
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[ ... except she went rogue (ha) after returning from genosha, and she refused to listen to anyone's reasoning and comfort words. but she also felt it wasn't the time to sit around and waddle in sadness when the incident was still so fresh, and she could find bring justice in some sort of way. ]
— Ya know, Morph Honey, since we both gotta face Scott, maybe we can work on each other's apology speeches. Grade on each other if we pass or fail before the big exam.
[ this is her attempt to take their incidents, and twist it into some sort of a light-hearted fun thing. ]
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[They don't sound at all bothered by it, though. No, it's Rogue's next suggestion that ends with Morph making a bit of a face, pausing to chew through another bite of food as they thought it over.
Some of what they had said to the teenage Scott was really heavy stuff. As much as they needed to apologize for it, they also didn't want to drag this conversation back down. It's a good thing Morph only selectively takes things seriously.]
Then I'll start.
'Hey kiddo, sorry I turned into some monster from a horror movie. I don't hate the adult you THAT much, I just think he's boring. And Logan and I make fun of him behind his back. But you're way cooler now than you're going to be when you're in your 30s, so I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Just ignore all that other stuff I said, that weird alien force had a real chip on its shoulder.'
1/????
2/????
wait, is she hearing this right?
'And Logan and I make fun of him behind his back. But you're way cooler now than you're going to be when you're in your 30s —'
this... this can't be the serious and messed up thing they had said to him and this kotone. or maybe they're just putting the talk lightly? ]
3/4
rogue's expression slowly scrunches, and her nose wrinkles as if she just got a whiff of something that went extremely sour, but not having the slightest idea where the source of that horrible stench is coming from. but regardless of her look, she patiently waits for her companion to finish their rehearsal. ]
4/4
... Now, lemme see if I'm gettin' this right, Sugah. This horrible, terrible thing you said to Scott while you were infected was that you hated him 'cause he wasn't cool?
cw: suicidal ideation
[Morph looks a little like they'd just gotten scolded, even though Rogue hadn't been that harsh at all. They were going to have to really fess up to it, weren't they?]
... I told him he needed to die. Because... without him around, the Morph in his world would get to be taken home for a burial instead of left out there with the sentinels.
I wasn't in my right mind, Rogue. [That much is probably obvious, but they felt the need to say it.]
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he must think the X-Men are monsters, and not at all the champions who represent that mutants and humans can coexist if they use their extraordinary talents correctly. she can feel her eyes burning, but she blinks rapidly, so the tears won't see the light of day. because they can still turn all of this around, and show they are the good guys... or maybe there's a chance for morph to prove that. it might be game over for her.
the woman stretches her hand over the table to grab a hold of theirs, squeezing lovingly as her gloved thumb carcasses along. it's time like these, she wishes she could feel another person's skin and vice versa to express the real comfort she wants to show. ]
Oh, Morph. [ she says, her voice in quivers again, but trying to stay intact. ] You weren't. None of the infected were. Scott might be younger and from a different Earth, but Scott is still Scott. He'll understand, I know he will.
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[Morph just feels like it's important to say it. The last time they had been too inside their own head was when they were stuck on Muir Island, while Moira was treating them and they had way too much time to sit and think about what had happened. But things had gotten better again, way better, so it honestly wasn't something they dwelled on much.
They manage a faint smile, turning their hand in her grasp to squeeze her gloved fingers in return.]
Yeah, he's a good kid. I'm just going to have to explain why I said all that stuff, and it's going to make an apology tougher. It's not just that it's personal... I don't want to only tell him stories about the bad things that the X-Men have faced.
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Ain't that the truth, Honey? I blame that damn app for havin' me tell Scott about me and Erik. I'm not ashamed of... having relations with him, but... Erik and I were trying to keep the past where it belonged. Keep everything tucked in a closet.
[ except, now looking back, it was probably painfully obvious there was something going on. with the way they've always seemed to conveniently disappear together, show up during their meetings together, and magneto wanted rogue to tag along with him to genosha alone until gambit protested that idea, and demanded to come with them. ]
And me confessin' about him led me into explaining why I was with a terrorist, then about Genosha, and then... my choice. I didn't make what we faced sound any better, either.
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Believe me, I understand why you wanted to keep it quiet. It took all of us a while to even start getting used to him being around, and then...
[Well, then Genosha happened. If it weren't for that, Magneto wouldn't have gone right off the deep end. For a minute there, it really seemed like Erik leading the X-Men was going to work out... that the two different philosophies had finally coalesced into one goal. No such luck, though.]
Wait, so he knew Magneto was a terrorist? Did he say anything at all about what the one on his world is like? Maybe he's a worse guy in their timeline. Or maybe Scott doesn't know enough about him to, well, really get where he might be coming from.
[Then again, Genosha on its own was a terrible story. That would be enough to scare anyone.]
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[ but whether scott's magneto attempted to bring peace and for everyone to coexist is up in the air. she releases her hold on morph's hand and sags back into her seat, arms folded over her chest to avert her gaze while wearing an unease expression. ]
And I... might've carried on about what Erik did to shut down the Prime Sentinels.
[ and rogue doesn't need to tell nor explain to her companion how that conversation went down, it was like someone decided to hit the rewind button on the VHS tape to that exact scene. ]
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[What they wouldn't give for some advice from the Professor right now. Was dealing with teenagers normally this hard? Or just the ones from different timelines?]
What Erik did was a sledgehammer move, but honestly? I don't know how else we could've dealt with the Prime Sentinels. In sheer numbers it was practically an army, and they're tough to fight. I... I don't know if it was worth the damage, but if it hadn't happened, I'm not sure we would've survived it.
[And how many other mutants had Magneto saved in the process? There was no way the Prime Sentinels were only targeting the X-Men. It was damned if you do, damned if you don't, and the only difference was that Erik hadn't hesitated. And if he had only decided to work with the X-Men instead of giving into his rage... they could've avoided a good chunk of the disaster that followed.]
Did you tell him that Magneto was leading the team for a while there? It might've been rocky, but we were working together, and that's not nothing.
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I told him, and he responded like you'd think. [ in fact, the mutant hums out a small chuckle as she picks up her fork to shove. ] — Heh, just like our Scott. But ours was a lil' angrier, I think. Hard to tell over text.
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[Ugh, and now knowing that the UN had been hiding or funding the Prime Sentinels in some capacity at the same time... Morph could imagine that there was some 'right hand doesn't know what the left hand is doing' level corruption involved, but it made it hard to trust them now. Or anyone, really. Even when things were going good, the team had gotten a little too complacent, and it seemed like even Magneto had let his guard down a little too far.
And that sucked, too. Morph didn't like the idea that they had to be quite so paranoid to survive. They chewed for a moment on a bite of food before saying,]
I'm sure we can work things out with the kid-Scott. Give it a little time. He just needs to see that you're not a bad person.