[it's on another sweep through the clinic that Vi finds herself near Scott's bed. she's exhausted and a little beat up herself -- not enough that she also needs a stay here, but enough that she's sore. but she has to check in on him, regardless of what that bird is thinking as it looks at her.]
What? I'm not gonna do shit to him. Just make sure he's not dead.
[which she knows he isn't, by the breathing. but still, she's got to act like she's unconcerned while actually being concerned--]
[Said bird squints at Vi, chest puffing up a little because a) where are her snacks and b) she trusted the girl with the XXII and look what happened!! But there's a small shuffling on the bed as Scott becomes aware of the conversation, not exactly turning around to greet Vi, but just making sure that the fiery bird by his bedside doesn't do anything to hurt anyone.]
She's fine, Phoenix.
[So, with a little huff, Phoenix flaps to the end of the bed, mostly leaving the two to talk. Just a little points eyes to you--]
[and she'll also straighten up, almost as if she's also going to fight Phoenix. she probably would at this rate, given how foul her mood was and how tired she was of everything right now.
but then Scott speaks and the tension dissipates, and Vi looks back down at him.]
Well, I can tell that just by looking at you.
[she leans against the bed a bit, crossing her arms.]
[He stares at the wall for a few seconds, prolonging his eventual answer. Being extra moody is required.]
...I just had a bad encounter, that's all. It's not anything big around here, right? You and others have gotten hurt in the past.
[Honestly, isn't it kind of surprising that it took this long for him to end up like this? A part of him feels like he shouldn't complain at all, especially since he's a X-Man now. He's like. Supposed to get hurt and everything, that's what he basically signed up for. He didn't get tossed around the Danger Room for no reason.
Still, even knowing all that, why does everything feel so fucking awful? Well, guess the fact that it was his transformed girlfriend that did all this probably didn't help, but also not her fault. And not a big deal. Stuff like this also happened before and he's not dead.]
[What the hell, twice?! He sort of remembers Jinx telling him that she and Silco killed each other, but... shit. It's enough of a shock to his system that he's nearly pulled from his own morose attitude, Scott immediately turning from the wall so that he can look at Vi through his new visor. And he's frowning. That's definitely happening, even if a part of him winces from the sudden movement.
It's fine. Okay, not really, but Scott's just focused on her now.]
You got killed twice? [......] And you think I'm not reacting enough??
[Maybe not the words he really wanted to say, but.]
[He mumbles under his breath, but still clearly audible for Vi to hear. There's that sullen attitude, just feeling a bit uncomfortable that she's digging further into this. Can't he just say he's fine and they can all move on? His hands clench against the sheets, burrowing slightly, as he struggles with what he wants to say.]
We've dealt with a lot of fucked up things here, Vi. This one shouldn't be that much different. And... and I'm a X-Man too now, so I'm even more prepared. [He's supposed to get hurt, probably.]
He can almost picture Alex saying the same thing as Vi right now. He remembers his brother still, although he couldn't see him, standing by his bed and trying to help him through a life changing event. He first got his powers and thought his life was over and... it's been two years since then? Or is it just a couple of months?
Everything changed and he's gone. Now he's a X-Man, but still lying half-beaten on this bed with someone else trying to help him, a person that's dealt with younger siblings all the time.
Scott does his best to fight down the crack in his voice, but he's not entirely successful.]
Then how am I supposed to handle it? I-I'm not hurting the person that did this to me.
[there's a moment where she looks at Scott, and then away. she looks at her own hands, thinking about it... thinking about what she wants to say.]
You don't have to always hurt the people who hurt you. Especially if it's someone you love.
[she's learned that from Jinx and Caitlyn. two people she knows she'll never raise an actual hand to again. whatever sister fights they get into (usually with one of them sitting on top of the other), doesn't count.]
Cry it out. Let yourself feel it. Punch something, or destroy something if you need to get anger out when you're able. If I got alcohol, I'll provide drinks.
[she cracks a bit of a smile at that one, trying to make what might be not an amazing joke.]
[He feels like he cries all the time-- at least, more than most people around here. It felt embarrassing each time, but Scott can't deny that it's helped in the past. But... he's not sure if he can cry right now?? He doesn't even feel angry enough to punch something. He's upset and frustrated, yes, but it's in this weird space for him. He doesn't know. Feelings are so dumb!!]
I thought you weren't supposed to drink yourself into a stupor. [Scott decides to address that last suggestion, just because it's the easiest to poke at. At least he seems to consider Vi's words overall, hands idly picking at the bed sheets before he sighs.] I don't know. I don't feel like doing any of those things. Maybe I should put my energy into training and getting stronger.
[oh Scott... you haven't seen how much Vi's cried here.]
Ah, yeah. Trying not to, but sometimes it's the only thing I can do.
[at least she's self aware that she has a problem, especially after coming back. even if she's trying not to run straight towards a bottle every time she gets upset, it's... hard.
she shrugs.]
You can do that too, once you get better. But for now... rest. Learn from it, but don't beat yourself up too much. Trust me, it keeps you in one place more than it moves you forward.
[...Maybe it helps just a tiny bit knowing that Vi is sort of a mess. Thanks big sis.
Scott doesn't directly acknowledge her advice, but despite the way he's curled his legs up to his knees and trying to be the picture of teen angst, he's still listening to her. She checked in on him and that's something he's been able to keep close to him. A small reminder of the people that care about him-- which he never doubted. But it's still big knowing they're here and they want to help.]
It just really sucks. [...] I think the worst part is knowing that she's going to feel really guilty about what happened.
[.....] You've had to deal with getting into big fights with the people you love, right?
[Scott's just going to assume that... seeing that Jinx is her sister.]
[Oh. Right. She told him about that-- it really just slipped his mind until now and it's not quite a bucket of cold water, but it helps Scott in some ways to snap out of his more morose attitude. Maybe not exactly what Vi's going for, since he's focusing on her again instead of himself, but it might all come around anyway and work out.]
And you weren't even controlled by anything. [Should he be mad at Vi? He's not feeling it, plus it's clear she's fully regretting what happened.]
[Vi hums for a moment, propping her leg up on the bed with her and draping her arm over it.]
She hurt a lot of people. Killed a few people, even. Killed Cait's mother in a bombing. I thought the sister I'd known seven years before that was gone, and in her place... a monster.
[her eyes sting a little bit, but she doesn't let herself get more emotional than that.]
I thought I was doing what was right, at the time. But even then, I couldn't do it.
[...Jinx hurting someone-- killing them, even if it was accidental, isn't really surprising to him. It still sucks, because well, they've had a weird sort of friendship ever since they met and so it's never great hearing that she's responsible for terrible shit. Must be worse for Vi. He's not sure how he'd react if Alex hurt a bunch of people, it's just far too difficult to even imagine. He's always been a hero.
Scott swallows as he thinks about Alex again; he won't ever be here for him. Maybe he'd show up in this world, but he forces himself not to think about that for long. It might be nice, but he'd still be gone back home. Like Jinx, supposedly.
Can one really just 'live life to the fullest' with that?]
She's your sister. Even if she did all those things, it would be hard to just kill her. [Scott grimaces. He looks at Vi with a half-helpless expression, like he doesn't really know what to say.] It's not a thing anyone can just do.
That helpless expression shifts into a small smile, the mutant looking back down on his lap with a somewhat lighter feeling in his chest. It probably won't last too long, but it's nice right now. Maybe it's all he can hope for right now, when things are so fucked up.]
...But I'm glad, Vi. For the both of you. [Sometimes he wants to bonk Jinx and tell her to don't take her sibling for granted. Especially one that cares about her so much. He was too late with Alex. Granted, Alex never tried to kill him, but yanno.]
And don't worry, I don't plan on letting this fester between me and the person who did this. It's not like she wanted this anyway.
Yeah, well. You need to take care of yourself, too.
[in any way possible. she knows what it's like to keep going regardless of being tired. that's how she ended up so damn burnt out and in those pitfighting arenas.
though she figures Scott wouldn't do anything so drastic here.]
Good. I'm sure you'll smooth everything over with her. This place does some wild shit, so we have to make sure it doesn't fuck up our bonds with other people.
[He nods, Scott agreeing with far less hesitation about that. He will make sure that this doesn't fuck up his relationship with Kotone. Honestly, he can't even fathom it, them not being close or together in this world-- at least until one of them disappears. But until that happens, he always wants to be with her.
Taking codependency for $1000 Alex--]
We've been through a lot together. I don't plan on making this the thing that breaks us apart.
[Does this make it obvious about the person he's referring to? Maybe. Scott can't entirely help it and he probably wouldn't deny Vi's answer if she guessed.]
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expiationmods) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
expiationlogs2025-03-11 10:18 am
atomized
What? I'm not gonna do shit to him. Just make sure he's not dead.
[which she knows he isn't, by the breathing. but still, she's got to act like she's unconcerned while actually being concerned--]
no subject
She's fine, Phoenix.
[So, with a little huff, Phoenix flaps to the end of the bed, mostly leaving the two to talk. Just a little points eyes to you--]
And I'm not dead. [...] Thanks for checking.
[It's sulking grumpy teenage Scott time.]
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but then Scott speaks and the tension dissipates, and Vi looks back down at him.]
Well, I can tell that just by looking at you.
[she leans against the bed a bit, crossing her arms.]
Looks like you went too hard, though.
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...I just had a bad encounter, that's all. It's not anything big around here, right? You and others have gotten hurt in the past.
[Honestly, isn't it kind of surprising that it took this long for him to end up like this? A part of him feels like he shouldn't complain at all, especially since he's a X-Man now. He's like. Supposed to get hurt and everything, that's what he basically signed up for. He didn't get tossed around the Danger Room for no reason.
Still, even knowing all that, why does everything feel so fucking awful? Well, guess the fact that it was his transformed girlfriend that did all this probably didn't help, but also not her fault. And not a big deal. Stuff like this also happened before and he's not dead.]
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I've died twice here.
[she says it so nonchalantly too, as if she didn't still have nightmares about both encounters. Ragna and Silco... those two who'd killed her before.
she pushes the thought away. it's always easier to escape your own thoughts when you're concerned about someone else.]
But it still leaves its mark on you, whether you die or not. Don't downplay yourself and your feelings.
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It's fine. Okay, not really, but Scott's just focused on her now.]
You got killed twice? [......] And you think I'm not reacting enough??
[Maybe not the words he really wanted to say, but.]
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That's not what I want to focus on.
[she sits at the edge of his bed, where there's unoccupied space.]
I'm trying to tell you that it's okay to be a little fucked up after whatever happened.
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[He mumbles under his breath, but still clearly audible for Vi to hear. There's that sullen attitude, just feeling a bit uncomfortable that she's digging further into this. Can't he just say he's fine and they can all move on? His hands clench against the sheets, burrowing slightly, as he struggles with what he wants to say.]
We've dealt with a lot of fucked up things here, Vi. This one shouldn't be that much different. And... and I'm a X-Man too now, so I'm even more prepared. [He's supposed to get hurt, probably.]
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[you accepted her as your sister, Scott. this is her being a sister. LMFAO.
she tilts her head a bit.]
That doesn't mean you can't be upset by them. Don't know what an X-Man is, but... don't bury it. It always backfires.
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He can almost picture Alex saying the same thing as Vi right now. He remembers his brother still, although he couldn't see him, standing by his bed and trying to help him through a life changing event. He first got his powers and thought his life was over and... it's been two years since then? Or is it just a couple of months?
Everything changed and he's gone. Now he's a X-Man, but still lying half-beaten on this bed with someone else trying to help him, a person that's dealt with younger siblings all the time.
Scott does his best to fight down the crack in his voice, but he's not entirely successful.]
Then how am I supposed to handle it? I-I'm not hurting the person that did this to me.
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You don't have to always hurt the people who hurt you. Especially if it's someone you love.
[she's learned that from Jinx and Caitlyn. two people she knows she'll never raise an actual hand to again. whatever sister fights they get into (usually with one of them sitting on top of the other), doesn't count.]
Cry it out. Let yourself feel it. Punch something, or destroy something if you need to get anger out when you're able. If I got alcohol, I'll provide drinks.
[she cracks a bit of a smile at that one, trying to make what might be not an amazing joke.]
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I thought you weren't supposed to drink yourself into a stupor. [Scott decides to address that last suggestion, just because it's the easiest to poke at. At least he seems to consider Vi's words overall, hands idly picking at the bed sheets before he sighs.] I don't know. I don't feel like doing any of those things. Maybe I should put my energy into training and getting stronger.
[Then he'd be more prepared and stuff.]
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Ah, yeah. Trying not to, but sometimes it's the only thing I can do.
[at least she's self aware that she has a problem, especially after coming back. even if she's trying not to run straight towards a bottle every time she gets upset, it's... hard.
she shrugs.]
You can do that too, once you get better. But for now... rest. Learn from it, but don't beat yourself up too much. Trust me, it keeps you in one place more than it moves you forward.
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Scott doesn't directly acknowledge her advice, but despite the way he's curled his legs up to his knees and trying to be the picture of teen angst, he's still listening to her. She checked in on him and that's something he's been able to keep close to him. A small reminder of the people that care about him-- which he never doubted. But it's still big knowing they're here and they want to help.]
It just really sucks. [...] I think the worst part is knowing that she's going to feel really guilty about what happened.
[.....] You've had to deal with getting into big fights with the people you love, right?
[Scott's just going to assume that... seeing that Jinx is her sister.]
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she gets quiet at his question, and she looks at her hands.]
I wasn't lying when we were in that dream place that I tried to kill her. Or... I thought I wanted to.
[Jinx had said here that she knew she'd never actually wanted to, but still.]
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And you weren't even controlled by anything. [Should he be mad at Vi? He's not feeling it, plus it's clear she's fully regretting what happened.]
...What drove you to do that?
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She hurt a lot of people. Killed a few people, even. Killed Cait's mother in a bombing. I thought the sister I'd known seven years before that was gone, and in her place... a monster.
[her eyes sting a little bit, but she doesn't let herself get more emotional than that.]
I thought I was doing what was right, at the time. But even then, I couldn't do it.
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Scott swallows as he thinks about Alex again; he won't ever be here for him. Maybe he'd show up in this world, but he forces himself not to think about that for long. It might be nice, but he'd still be gone back home. Like Jinx, supposedly.
Can one really just 'live life to the fullest' with that?]
She's your sister. Even if she did all those things, it would be hard to just kill her. [Scott grimaces. He looks at Vi with a half-helpless expression, like he doesn't really know what to say.] It's not a thing anyone can just do.
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she notices that he looks kinda helpless about it, and she smiles a bit.]
You don't have to comfort me or anything. And I don't appreciate how it keeps coming back around to me when I'm trying to talk to you, kid.
[she would playfully nudge or smack him, but she's not sure how sore he really is. so she keeps her hands to herself, tilting her head.]
The point is, we still love each other. And we've moved past all that. It'll be fine, in the end.
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[Busted again, huh?
That helpless expression shifts into a small smile, the mutant looking back down on his lap with a somewhat lighter feeling in his chest. It probably won't last too long, but it's nice right now. Maybe it's all he can hope for right now, when things are so fucked up.]
...But I'm glad, Vi. For the both of you. [Sometimes he wants to bonk Jinx and tell her to don't take her sibling for granted. Especially one that cares about her so much. He was too late with Alex. Granted, Alex never tried to kill him, but yanno.]
And don't worry, I don't plan on letting this fester between me and the person who did this. It's not like she wanted this anyway.
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[in any way possible. she knows what it's like to keep going regardless of being tired. that's how she ended up so damn burnt out and in those pitfighting arenas.
though she figures Scott wouldn't do anything so drastic here.]
Good. I'm sure you'll smooth everything over with her. This place does some wild shit, so we have to make sure it doesn't fuck up our bonds with other people.
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Taking codependency for $1000 Alex--]
We've been through a lot together. I don't plan on making this the thing that breaks us apart.
[Does this make it obvious about the person he's referring to? Maybe. Scott can't entirely help it and he probably wouldn't deny Vi's answer if she guessed.]
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she nods though, thinking she might know who he's talking about, but speculating that he doesn't want to say her name for a reason.]
That's good. When you have something special, you've really got to hold on tight to it, you know? Especially in a place like this.