[Despair is not a lie, it is the only truth. But it is also comfort, he agrees and knows this well. Long ago, he gave up struggling for hope and allowed the depths of despair to claim him. For thousands of years, he's been sinking deeper into the darkness, finding the only comfort he can in absolute surrender.
His silver eyes sweep upward, reflecting the stars.]
Light takes time to travel.
[He says, then his gaze cuts back to Visas.]
Even the stars you see in yonder expanse are long dead.
We live, we suffer, then we are nothing. So why live at all?
[Before she can answer, he continues.]
Life brings only pain. Such is my answer.
You say I am apathetic. Well! Mayhap I am. But know my poor, beleaguered soul spent ten millennia considering its answer to the question. I've had my entire life to think on it... I've lived. I've suffered. I've felt every hurt of my star as I watched over life itself. My heart is naught but scar tissue now.
[Saying this, his pale features light up in a pained grin and he reaches out to playfully rap her upper arm with his knuckles.]
Which grants me impartiality in my verdict, I think. What fun!
[It saddens Visas to see his determination on ruin. It is proof that she has much more to learn... she is not equal to the Exile yet. It will take more than one encounter, clearly, to save this man.
But she must try. His pain is deep. The echoes... she can feel them, echoing through the very emissaries that he sent to the stars to assuage that pain.
However, she cannot accept his logic.]
No... no, I do not think you are apathetic. You are desperate still. But you cling to the wrong answer.
Why should immortality give you impartiality? Your pain is deep. Scars... [She has many of her own, physical ones. They pain her when storms come, when the air recyclers on the ship change their modulations.] A scar may knit your flesh. But it pulls, reminding you always of the wounds that have long ceased to bleed.
The nerves around and through a scar signal strangely. [She traces one of her own, down and across her ribs. A burn from the destruction of Katarr, that pulls when she sleeps in the wrong position.] Life is more than pain. Joy, contentment, boredom... but perhaps the scars in your heart are too thick and tight for you to understand when they are around you. You are not in the least impartial.
I'm alive!
His silver eyes sweep upward, reflecting the stars.]
Light takes time to travel.
[He says, then his gaze cuts back to Visas.]
Even the stars you see in yonder expanse are long dead.
We live, we suffer, then we are nothing. So why live at all?
[Before she can answer, he continues.]
Life brings only pain. Such is my answer.
You say I am apathetic. Well! Mayhap I am. But know my poor, beleaguered soul spent ten millennia considering its answer to the question. I've had my entire life to think on it... I've lived. I've suffered. I've felt every hurt of my star as I watched over life itself. My heart is naught but scar tissue now.
[Saying this, his pale features light up in a pained grin and he reaches out to playfully rap her upper arm with his knuckles.]
Which grants me impartiality in my verdict, I think. What fun!
same! :'D
But she must try. His pain is deep. The echoes... she can feel them, echoing through the very emissaries that he sent to the stars to assuage that pain.
However, she cannot accept his logic.]
No... no, I do not think you are apathetic. You are desperate still. But you cling to the wrong answer.
Why should immortality give you impartiality? Your pain is deep. Scars... [She has many of her own, physical ones. They pain her when storms come, when the air recyclers on the ship change their modulations.] A scar may knit your flesh. But it pulls, reminding you always of the wounds that have long ceased to bleed.
The nerves around and through a scar signal strangely. [She traces one of her own, down and across her ribs. A burn from the destruction of Katarr, that pulls when she sleeps in the wrong position.] Life is more than pain. Joy, contentment, boredom... but perhaps the scars in your heart are too thick and tight for you to understand when they are around you. You are not in the least impartial.