[Some of us had far more potential than others, he says, and Octavian thinks, oh, he's going to give the speech anyway? Is he? No? He's almost surprised there isn't a whole speech, but perhaps looking upon one's own death from this angle is more of a distraction than not. It is, after all, Silco's first time.
Octavian almost envies the novelty. He has been here- well, sort of- so many times. Enough times that now he rises in his own corpse, a mangled thing, wringing more blood out of his hair as he looks at the floor.]
You measure the value of a human life against nothing and reward yourself with indignant rage when your hands come away empty. Potential is air. Legacy has weight. Neither make a death more than a thing that happened.
[He's interrupted by his own body pitching forward, and he grabs the back of a chair to keep himself from falling as he makes a wet sound and spits blood. God, maybe the corpse ride wasn't worth it after all. Maybe he's talking too much, but alas, death is a thing he has opinions on.]
I have been dead for a long time. It is a thing that happened to me. What does it reflect on me? Perhaps that I should have turned around sooner. Ducked.
[He straightens up... mostly. Ugh.] Your potential had nothing to do with this. It is not pathetic to die.
[Potential was everything. His life, his legacy, his plans, his death had all come down to potential realized. If he hadn't had it in him, none of this would have been possible, the victories and failures, the triumphs and loses, the care and sadness, the blooded fingers, screams ripped from raw throats, the creak of a chair, the taste of smoke at the back of his throat.
It all collimated to this one single moment. Death. His death, which was pointless and ended a lifetime of potential with a single blast of gunfire. How ironic that the same love that killed Vander was the same emotion that earned him a similar fate. He stared at the scene, walking around to view it from all angles.]
Potential and legacy are everything, buoyed by the action within one's will. Without either, who are we to struggle through the misery of life? [He paused in his observations.] You don't believe that you couldn't be so much more had you lived?
[He watched Octavian and wondered if he could sit in his own body as well. What was the point? He had stopped breathing, his heart had stopped pumping, and there was nothing left for him to do but stare. He'd seen death, known it since some of his first memories. It hit different as his own. It made him... angry. At Vi, at the Piltover, at the world.
Not Jinx, his killer. Never her.]
I disagree. I had more yet to do, and now it's been stolen from me. All because one stupid girl couldn't keep her damn mouth shut. [He curled his upper lip in a sneer, warping the deep lines of scarring on the left side of his face.] And I missed taking her with me.
[He doesn't laugh, but he gives a wet kind of chuckling sound and leans a bit off-kilter with it, shoulders trembling with the action. Here he is, a crime against whatever gods one chooses to believe in purely because he refused to lie down quietly on that floor and stay there, and Silco asks him about had-you-lived. He wipes an already bloody sleeve over his wet mouth and then gestures to himself; this thing, the dead man that moves, the spectre.]
I have already become more. And by whose blessing do I persist? I did not tear myself from my corpse to wax poetic about my potential.
[Death is a thing that happens, ergo, death is a thing that can be refused, QED. Potential is a wish; there is no magic good enough to hack it gene, there is only does or does not.
He waves a hand and moves away from the chair he'd been leaning on, to see what the boundaries of this room are. If they can leave this double feature and how bad it is to look at, all the better.]
Stolen from you. Empty hands. Take it back or leave it behind.
[He found it interesting that Octavian was wearing his own dead body like a macabre meat suit when it was clearly limited in its functionality. He had to wonder if that ability was limited to one's own corpse or if Octavian was multifunctional when it came to any dead body. He was not going to invite the other to try his, of course.]
You consider this existence a blessing? I suppose it is better than oblivion.
[It seemed that they were at an ideological crossroad on how to discuss and accept their own deaths. Silco was moving away to move deeper into his portion of the scene, easing into a crouch to examine his own death body. He did wonder how long Jinx left him tied up like this, though he knew she had transported and disposed of him at some point.
Yet, his attention never strayed far from Octavian moving around the room, seeking the edges of their mutual prison.]
I intend to take it back. It's what I've been doing.
no subject
Octavian almost envies the novelty. He has been here- well, sort of- so many times. Enough times that now he rises in his own corpse, a mangled thing, wringing more blood out of his hair as he looks at the floor.]
You measure the value of a human life against nothing and reward yourself with indignant rage when your hands come away empty. Potential is air. Legacy has weight. Neither make a death more than a thing that happened.
[He's interrupted by his own body pitching forward, and he grabs the back of a chair to keep himself from falling as he makes a wet sound and spits blood. God, maybe the corpse ride wasn't worth it after all. Maybe he's talking too much, but alas, death is a thing he has opinions on.]
I have been dead for a long time. It is a thing that happened to me. What does it reflect on me? Perhaps that I should have turned around sooner. Ducked.
[He straightens up... mostly. Ugh.] Your potential had nothing to do with this. It is not pathetic to die.
no subject
It all collimated to this one single moment. Death. His death, which was pointless and ended a lifetime of potential with a single blast of gunfire. How ironic that the same love that killed Vander was the same emotion that earned him a similar fate. He stared at the scene, walking around to view it from all angles.]
Potential and legacy are everything, buoyed by the action within one's will. Without either, who are we to struggle through the misery of life? [He paused in his observations.] You don't believe that you couldn't be so much more had you lived?
[He watched Octavian and wondered if he could sit in his own body as well. What was the point? He had stopped breathing, his heart had stopped pumping, and there was nothing left for him to do but stare. He'd seen death, known it since some of his first memories. It hit different as his own. It made him... angry. At Vi, at the Piltover, at the world.
Not Jinx, his killer. Never her.]
I disagree. I had more yet to do, and now it's been stolen from me. All because one stupid girl couldn't keep her damn mouth shut. [He curled his upper lip in a sneer, warping the deep lines of scarring on the left side of his face.] And I missed taking her with me.
no subject
I have already become more. And by whose blessing do I persist? I did not tear myself from my corpse to wax poetic about my potential.
[Death is a thing that happens, ergo, death is a thing that can be refused, QED. Potential is a wish; there is no magic good enough to hack it gene, there is only does or does not.
He waves a hand and moves away from the chair he'd been leaning on, to see what the boundaries of this room are. If they can leave this double feature and how bad it is to look at, all the better.]
Stolen from you. Empty hands. Take it back or leave it behind.
no subject
You consider this existence a blessing? I suppose it is better than oblivion.
[It seemed that they were at an ideological crossroad on how to discuss and accept their own deaths. Silco was moving away to move deeper into his portion of the scene, easing into a crouch to examine his own death body. He did wonder how long Jinx left him tied up like this, though he knew she had transported and disposed of him at some point.
Yet, his attention never strayed far from Octavian moving around the room, seeking the edges of their mutual prison.]
I intend to take it back. It's what I've been doing.