It's only his first day in here, but he has no doubt in his mind that this is a place that he would want to stay for a long, long while. Everyone seems to be having fun here, learning in unconventional means for their unconventional talents, and everyone's quiet joy is palpable in the air. It makes Ryoji want to take a look around, to simply soak in the essence of where he is. And that is where he finds the bespectacled tour guide from earlier, resting by a tree.
He smiles back at Scott, a polite wave as his own greeting.]
It really is peaceful here. A good place to live in.
[But, in the back of his mind, he wonders - is this peace truly real?]
Yeah... everyone's happy. [Which feels like a corny thing to say, way too mushy for a teenager like him, but right now, it feels good to admit.
But despite his own comment, there's a seed of anxiety in him, something he desperately tries to hide behind his usual self-satisfied and goading behavior. Everything right now is nice, good. His friends are here. Mutants are safe. There shouldn't be anything to worry about. There isn't, right? It's just stupid teenage thoughts; he's just having them.
Nonetheless, he pats the ground next to him, inviting Ryoji to join him.]
How was your first day? Don't tell me you got lost, because if you did, that's totally on you. [He gave a great tour!! 1000%.]
[Isn’t that what we should all strive for, though? A happy and peaceful school like, just like any ordinary person! Not that anybody in this school is ordinary, but still. He happily takes the seat beside Scott, back resting against the bark of the tree. It’s pickly, but not uncomfortable.
The scent of the earth reminds him of playgrounds and cemeteries.]
I totally did not! [He pouted, even though he did absolutely got lost in my first day.] It’s just happened that I was a little late for second period — there’s just so many corridors in this place!
[Cool kids sit against trees, even if they're uncomfortable. He doesn't make the rules.]
Oh, so you definitely got lost. [Scott doesn't hide his laugh, his shoulder knocking into Ryoji's in a way that speaks of a close friendship. A little strange for him, because he really doesn't make friends that easily, right? Hell, he was an outcast for so long, with little to no friends, and that only changed when he got here. He just... sort of wanted to, for whatever reason.
He's not regretting it.] Do I need to make a map for you man?
[Scott really does feel familiar, doesn’t he? Like a friend he has known for so long yet has no memory of meeting before. It’s the same way he used to feel for Kotone-chan, back when they first met.
…Who’s Kotone-chan?]
Oh! [His thoughts are interrupted by Scott himself, and Ryoji can’t help but give him a wide grin.]
Alright, alright. I do think I might need one. That’s not gonna inflate your ego or anything, right?
[Totally helpless, this one. He really doesn't know much about the new student, but he's still been pretty cool to hang out with. He's already pretty popular with a lot of the students too, especially the girls, something that gets Scott to roll his eyes about. Maybe he should get one of them to make a map for Ryoji, but whatever.
Something in the air is still tense though, that nothing can last forever. It's such a grim feeling, Scott shifting on the ground and doing his best to ignore it. He's not sure why that it won't go away.]
I'm charging you extra for that. [What does that mean?! Probably something like Scott stealing an extra snack from Ryoji.] And hey, I'm just helping the poor lost souls around school.
Eeeeeeeeeh?! [Ryoji pouts and whines like a teenager boy.] You’re exploiting a helpless newbie like this!
[He still laughs at the end though, showing that he doesn’t take it that seriously. Even without the prospect of a map or guidance or instructions, he wouldn’t mind owing Scott a favor or two regardless. There’s just something about him that feels very close and reliable, like finding out you have an excellent chemistry with someone from the get go.
At this moment, an idea pops out in Ryoji’s head. His eyes brighten — you could practically see the lightbulb hovering over his head.]
How about this! I can give you tips on how to woo anyone you want! Surely you have a crush on someone at school.
[He has zero guilt about it too!! Scott laughs as well, shoulder bumping into Ryoji's despite the tension in the air, like he's trying his hardest to ignore that inevitable feeling... the feeling of how nothing can last forever. It's not really something he's felt a lot until recently, until he actually found a place he wanted to be with plenty of friends everywhere, but he doesn't like it. Why shouldn't it last forever? His friends and him living normal peaceful lives...
But he tries to focus on what Ryoji is saying to him, how he is obviously trying to tease him about having a crush and heh.]
You're kind of late on that one man. I'm already dating the cutest girl at this school. Maybe you heard of her? Kotone Shiomi.
[Scott truly is reliable, huh? He might be trying his best to appear jovial and laid-back, but the longer he tries the more exposed his true feelings become. It's just gut instinct, for now, but Ryoji could feel that strain pushing through his facade more and more.
He plays along for his sake, but part of him wonders if he should start to address it. What would he be concerned about, anyway? What would a regular teenager worry about in this time of their lives?]
Ooooh, congratulations! Kotone-chan is a really sweet girl.
[He nods, as if he knows her more than any other.]
Maybe I can help you find a gift for your next date, then!
[Scott smiles, not even trying to argue how lucky he is or that Kotone really is sweet and amazing and--]
So, you've already met Kotone, huh?
[Not too surprising, given that she's always inserting herself in people's business, especially someone that is new around here. Plus, Ryoji himself seems to be pretty outgoing and social himself. They'd definitely bump into each other at some point! Guess they're kind of alike in that way, even though he's never met Ryoji before (not that he can remember) and Kotone's never mentioned knowing him from before.
.....Before when?
Eh, it's probably nothing big. Some people are just similar in some ways.]
What you're telling me that you already know what Kotone likes? [He snorts.] Or do you get the same sort of thing for every girl?
I sure have! She’s really fun and nice to talk to!
[Not that he remembers when he has met Kotone, but there’s a reason why she’s already so familiar to him, right? Even if it’s only his first day in here and all. Despite that, he feels like he has known this person his entire life, to the extent that he can probably read what she’s thinking at times.
That’s not concerning at all, right?]
Well ~ [Ryoji playfully responds in singsong.] I try my best to accommodate to the needs and wants of every girl, it’s the only right thing to do! But when it comes to Kotone-chan, it’s just slightly easier? Like I don’t even have to think of what she might like!
[Yeah, that's how everyone sees Kotone and they're right. Scott will fight anyone that'd say otherwise-- although, something so painful sometimes crops in his chest when he thinks about his girlfriend. Like she's a representation of how this peace won't last-- how nothing will last forever. It's such a grim thought, a fucking awful feeling to have in general, but Scott can't shake it. What the hell is wrong with him anyway?
He tries to focus on what Ryoji's saying and how he knows what to get for Kotone. It's a more fun topic, maybe, and Scott tries to tease the new student about his connection with her. His heart isn't fully in it though.]
Yeah? Okay, pop quiz then, what would you get her?
[Oh, that’s easy — the answer pops to his head immediately.]
I’d get her a stuffed animal, maybe something like a hamster! I think they suit her well. Another thing I’d get her is something like jewelry. Nothing too gaudy or sparkly, but I think it’d be really cute to give her something that would match her hairpins!
[Somehow there is fond nostalgia there, as if he’s reminiscing instead of making up ideas as he goes along. Not that he minds, when it feels like there’s nothing different between the two. Everything is so peaceful here, after all — like time doesn’t matter. Things could just stay like this forever.]
[Scott slowly admits, eyes blinking behind his shades. Shouldn't he be jealous hearing this? Like the new kid was able to bond or read Kotone that well so quickly? Maybe, but also, he trusts Kotone with everything that he is, so he knows he has nothing to worry about. His girlfriend deserves only the best anyway, because he loves her and...
His hand rises to his chest, fingers suddenly curling around the material there. That feeling is getting harder and harder to ignore and he doesn't know why. Strangely enough, it's gotten worse the longer he's talked with Ryoji, but that doesn't make sense, right? It's just his own feelings being stupid.]
[Worry grows on Ryoji’s features — from his point of view, it’s like Scott’s chest is hurting. Maybe he has trouble breathing? He doesn’t sound like it though. Either way, it’s clear that there’s something wrong, and Ryoji’s not the kind of person to ignore something like that.]
Are you sure?
[He even tries to look closer at Scott’s chest for emphasis. And also in case there’s something weirdly external going on there.]
[Comes the defensive response, but it quickly starts fading as he keeps his hand pressed against his chest. It hasn't gotten any better and keeping it in hasn't worked so far. Maybe he should talk about it? Ryoji is the new kid though... isn't it kind of lame for him to dump his worries and feelings on him? Probably. So, just be quiet, Summers.
...
His fingers curl harder against his shirt and it's becoming increasingly harder to not say anything. Scott bites his lip, his face contorting into something pained.]
I just. Keep thinking how none of this will last. Stupid, right?
[His eyebrows scrunch in obvious doubt. Yeah, Ryoji wouldn't have let you leave it at that, Scott. People don't get chest pains over nothing! Thankfully he doesn't need to prod any further.]
I don't think it's stupid. It's something that most people would worry about after all!
[He fiddles with his own scarf, electing to stare at the sky rather than Scott itself. Maybe what he has in mind would hurt him, but it's a truth that they both have to accept.]
[Is it strange that Ryoji's answer doesn't surprise him? With how friendly and silly he's been, this sort of serious response should be shocking. Upsetting. There's some of that, yes, but Scott just lets himself stare at his friend for a few seconds before turning his head away.
'Nothing lasts forever.' Not this peace, not his relationship with Kotone, his friendships... and it all hurts. And it's not because they will all grow old and pass away at some point, but because of something else. Something more violent will separate them.
Why does that feel inevitable?]
No, but what's wrong with wanting something like this to last as long as possible? [He sounds hurt, almost bitter. The pleasant air from before is just a little more stiff now.]
[He accepts it, the ire and the bitterness. Who would want to tell you that the peaceful happy times you have wouldn’t last? And yet, he feels like that Scott must accept this truth. That he needs to know that what they have around them wouldn’t stay, because…
Because what? Ryoji doesn’t know. All he could do is to follow his own instincts.]
There’s nothing wrong with it. [He responds, voice quieter than it was before.] But no matter how much we wish for it, it will not happen.
[It’s not like Ryoji doesn’t want this peace to last, either. This place is great! He wishes he could stay in here forever! But just like that he knows this is all but fleeting, like sand pouring inbetween his fingers.]
[His jaw tightens hearing Ryoji's response and suddenly, the laughter of children around them mutes, just leaving them as the only audible voices. More than that, it's like everything has slowed to a stop, maybe making it clear that this moment isn't entirely real either. At least, it doesn't exist in reality, just a cumulation of Scott's wants and hopes until it was poked apart.]
So, what, we're supposed to just accept that we're going to be sad and lose everyone we love? In just a few years?
[...] We're supposed to fight as hard as we can for them. N-no matter what.
[His breath hitches at the end, the mutant doing his best not to crumble in front of him. Even now, that feels embarrassing.]
[He can’t pretend that there isn’t anything off with this place anymore. Not when everything has begun to crumble around them, not when Scott is slowly realizing what this peace truly is: a mere fantasy.
Oh, he wants to comfort him. He draws the other young man into an embrace, because it’s the only way he knows how.]
And you can. Even if it only delays the inevitable by a bit — it’s still all worth it.
[That’s how the others did it. That’s how they can manage to fight against him and The Fall. And humanity will always prevail, again and again, deep into the future.]
Don’t think too hard of the future, Scott. Even if a flower wilts, it must bloom first. You must focus on that — on the reality of the present.
[There's a tenseness in Scott that persists for a couple more seconds, like he's trying so hard not to fold in himself, before it all collapses as he melts in the embrace with a small noise. Not quite a cry, but he holds Ryoji back, arms wrapped tight even as he listens to words that are both supporting and difficult to hear.
Delay the inevitable, huh? Can't they just keep doing that??
At least Ryoji says it's worth it. He doesn't know why, but somehow, it seems really significant coming from the other teen. The reasoning feels right within his grasp, but Scott can't discern it, so he simply lets it go for now. It's not like there's stuff for him to take in right now.]
W-what's that supposed to mean? Like make sure things are good right now?
[Scott doesn't really understand how Ryoji can jump from being so serious to having the dopiest smile in the universe. Not that he can see it very well in this position, but he can imagine it after hearing that cheerful encouragement. He's seen it enough by now.]
I do. [His voice is still quiet, but not as pained. Maybe this is a better talking point, somehow.] I mean, like I definitely don't take for granted the people I have now. My friends, Kotone, and everyone else. I made a promise to Kotone to live each day to the fullest.
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expiationlogs2025-01-13 12:39 pm
this peace will (not) last
It's only his first day in here, but he has no doubt in his mind that this is a place that he would want to stay for a long, long while. Everyone seems to be having fun here, learning in unconventional means for their unconventional talents, and everyone's quiet joy is palpable in the air. It makes Ryoji want to take a look around, to simply soak in the essence of where he is. And that is where he finds the bespectacled tour guide from earlier, resting by a tree.
He smiles back at Scott, a polite wave as his own greeting.]
It really is peaceful here. A good place to live in.
[But, in the back of his mind, he wonders - is this peace truly real?]
no subject
But despite his own comment, there's a seed of anxiety in him, something he desperately tries to hide behind his usual self-satisfied and goading behavior. Everything right now is nice, good. His friends are here. Mutants are safe. There shouldn't be anything to worry about. There isn't, right? It's just stupid teenage thoughts; he's just having them.
Nonetheless, he pats the ground next to him, inviting Ryoji to join him.]
How was your first day? Don't tell me you got lost, because if you did, that's totally on you. [He gave a great tour!! 1000%.]
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The scent of the earth reminds him of playgrounds and cemeteries.]
I totally did not! [He pouted, even though he did absolutely got lost in my first day.] It’s just happened that I was a little late for second period — there’s just so many corridors in this place!
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Oh, so you definitely got lost. [Scott doesn't hide his laugh, his shoulder knocking into Ryoji's in a way that speaks of a close friendship. A little strange for him, because he really doesn't make friends that easily, right? Hell, he was an outcast for so long, with little to no friends, and that only changed when he got here. He just... sort of wanted to, for whatever reason.
He's not regretting it.] Do I need to make a map for you man?
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…Who’s Kotone-chan?]
Oh! [His thoughts are interrupted by Scott himself, and Ryoji can’t help but give him a wide grin.]
Alright, alright. I do think I might need one. That’s not gonna inflate your ego or anything, right?
[Ah well. Maybe it doesn’t really matter.]
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Something in the air is still tense though, that nothing can last forever. It's such a grim feeling, Scott shifting on the ground and doing his best to ignore it. He's not sure why that it won't go away.]
I'm charging you extra for that. [What does that mean?! Probably something like Scott stealing an extra snack from Ryoji.] And hey, I'm just helping the poor lost souls around school.
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[He still laughs at the end though, showing that he doesn’t take it that seriously. Even without the prospect of a map or guidance or instructions, he wouldn’t mind owing Scott a favor or two regardless. There’s just something about him that feels very close and reliable, like finding out you have an excellent chemistry with someone from the get go.
At this moment, an idea pops out in Ryoji’s head. His eyes brighten — you could practically see the lightbulb hovering over his head.]
How about this! I can give you tips on how to woo anyone you want! Surely you have a crush on someone at school.
[A real cupid, this one.]
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[He has zero guilt about it too!! Scott laughs as well, shoulder bumping into Ryoji's despite the tension in the air, like he's trying his hardest to ignore that inevitable feeling... the feeling of how nothing can last forever. It's not really something he's felt a lot until recently, until he actually found a place he wanted to be with plenty of friends everywhere, but he doesn't like it. Why shouldn't it last forever? His friends and him living normal peaceful lives...
But he tries to focus on what Ryoji is saying to him, how he is obviously trying to tease him about having a crush and heh.]
You're kind of late on that one man. I'm already dating the cutest girl at this school. Maybe you heard of her? Kotone Shiomi.
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He plays along for his sake, but part of him wonders if he should start to address it. What would he be concerned about, anyway? What would a regular teenager worry about in this time of their lives?]
Ooooh, congratulations! Kotone-chan is a really sweet girl.
[He nods, as if he knows her more than any other.]
Maybe I can help you find a gift for your next date, then!
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So, you've already met Kotone, huh?
[Not too surprising, given that she's always inserting herself in people's business, especially someone that is new around here. Plus, Ryoji himself seems to be pretty outgoing and social himself. They'd definitely bump into each other at some point! Guess they're kind of alike in that way, even though he's never met Ryoji before (not that he can remember) and Kotone's never mentioned knowing him from before.
.....Before when?
Eh, it's probably nothing big. Some people are just similar in some ways.]
What you're telling me that you already know what Kotone likes? [He snorts.] Or do you get the same sort of thing for every girl?
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[Not that he remembers when he has met Kotone, but there’s a reason why she’s already so familiar to him, right? Even if it’s only his first day in here and all. Despite that, he feels like he has known this person his entire life, to the extent that he can probably read what she’s thinking at times.
That’s not concerning at all, right?]
Well ~ [Ryoji playfully responds in singsong.] I try my best to accommodate to the needs and wants of every girl, it’s the only right thing to do! But when it comes to Kotone-chan, it’s just slightly easier? Like I don’t even have to think of what she might like!
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He tries to focus on what Ryoji's saying and how he knows what to get for Kotone. It's a more fun topic, maybe, and Scott tries to tease the new student about his connection with her. His heart isn't fully in it though.]
Yeah? Okay, pop quiz then, what would you get her?
no subject
I’d get her a stuffed animal, maybe something like a hamster! I think they suit her well. Another thing I’d get her is something like jewelry. Nothing too gaudy or sparkly, but I think it’d be really cute to give her something that would match her hairpins!
[Somehow there is fond nostalgia there, as if he’s reminiscing instead of making up ideas as he goes along. Not that he minds, when it feels like there’s nothing different between the two. Everything is so peaceful here, after all — like time doesn’t matter. Things could just stay like this forever.]
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[Scott slowly admits, eyes blinking behind his shades. Shouldn't he be jealous hearing this? Like the new kid was able to bond or read Kotone that well so quickly? Maybe, but also, he trusts Kotone with everything that he is, so he knows he has nothing to worry about. His girlfriend deserves only the best anyway, because he loves her and...
His hand rises to his chest, fingers suddenly curling around the material there. That feeling is getting harder and harder to ignore and he doesn't know why. Strangely enough, it's gotten worse the longer he's talked with Ryoji, but that doesn't make sense, right? It's just his own feelings being stupid.]
Sorry, just having dumb thoughts.
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Are you sure?
[He even tries to look closer at Scott’s chest for emphasis. And also in case there’s something weirdly external going on there.]
Do you think talking about it would help?
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[Comes the defensive response, but it quickly starts fading as he keeps his hand pressed against his chest. It hasn't gotten any better and keeping it in hasn't worked so far. Maybe he should talk about it? Ryoji is the new kid though... isn't it kind of lame for him to dump his worries and feelings on him? Probably. So, just be quiet, Summers.
...
His fingers curl harder against his shirt and it's becoming increasingly harder to not say anything. Scott bites his lip, his face contorting into something pained.]
I just. Keep thinking how none of this will last. Stupid, right?
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I don't think it's stupid. It's something that most people would worry about after all!
[He fiddles with his own scarf, electing to stare at the sky rather than Scott itself. Maybe what he has in mind would hurt him, but it's a truth that they both have to accept.]
In a way, you're right. Nothing lasts forever.
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'Nothing lasts forever.' Not this peace, not his relationship with Kotone, his friendships... and it all hurts. And it's not because they will all grow old and pass away at some point, but because of something else. Something more violent will separate them.
Why does that feel inevitable?]
No, but what's wrong with wanting something like this to last as long as possible? [He sounds hurt, almost bitter. The pleasant air from before is just a little more stiff now.]
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Because what? Ryoji doesn’t know. All he could do is to follow his own instincts.]
There’s nothing wrong with it. [He responds, voice quieter than it was before.] But no matter how much we wish for it, it will not happen.
[It’s not like Ryoji doesn’t want this peace to last, either. This place is great! He wishes he could stay in here forever! But just like that he knows this is all but fleeting, like sand pouring inbetween his fingers.]
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So, what, we're supposed to just accept that we're going to be sad and lose everyone we love? In just a few years?
[...] We're supposed to fight as hard as we can for them. N-no matter what.
[His breath hitches at the end, the mutant doing his best not to crumble in front of him. Even now, that feels embarrassing.]
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Oh, he wants to comfort him. He draws the other young man into an embrace, because it’s the only way he knows how.]
And you can. Even if it only delays the inevitable by a bit — it’s still all worth it.
[That’s how the others did it. That’s how they can manage to fight against him and The Fall. And humanity will always prevail, again and again, deep into the future.]
Don’t think too hard of the future, Scott. Even if a flower wilts, it must bloom first. You must focus on that — on the reality of the present.
no subject
Delay the inevitable, huh? Can't they just keep doing that??
At least Ryoji says it's worth it. He doesn't know why, but somehow, it seems really significant coming from the other teen. The reasoning feels right within his grasp, but Scott can't discern it, so he simply lets it go for now. It's not like there's stuff for him to take in right now.]
W-what's that supposed to mean? Like make sure things are good right now?
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Yeah, you could say that!
[Cough, cough. Right. he's supposed to be comforting Scott here.]
It means that you're supposed to enjoy the moment. Cherish everything that you have, and just live in the present with that in mind.
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I do. [His voice is still quiet, but not as pained. Maybe this is a better talking point, somehow.] I mean, like I definitely don't take for granted the people I have now. My friends, Kotone, and everyone else. I made a promise to Kotone to live each day to the fullest.
[Especially with her.]