It's dangerous, I'll grant you that. But it's less dangerous than simply fighting them, force against force -- especially seeing as I don't see us winning in any traditional fight. And we need to keep you safe. That's of the utmost importance here.
[ He glances at her, and amends: ] I'm not saying that because I'm fond of you and would prefer you stay out of the line of fire though that is, of course, true. I'm saying that because if you have the capacity to heal them, we're going to need you. For everyone's sake.
[ He begins to walk around the room, shuffling through jars and potions and all sorts of foul smelling things, taking stock of what he has, what can be used. ]
If it were me underneath that spell, I'd more gladly die than to hurt innocents. But I would vastly prefer that someone just poison me and heal my mind afterwards, [ he says with a wry smile. ] That's not always the case. This isn't so terribly unlike something back home, and those, we just killed. There was no other choice.
[It's a fact of life for healers... that constant, ever-shifting algebra of when to advance and when to stay back. Sometimes you get it wrong and if you're lucky you don't get hurt too badly, but this is a situation where minor injuries don't seem even possible.]
It doesn't sound like there's a margin for error. If I put a foot wrong out there...
[She'll die again.
It dogs at her sense of cowardice. It's not a sense she thought she would ever need to be troubled by, but after her failure to reclaim her memories as she ought to have, the fear of it lurks at the edge of her thoughts, making her question herself. To hear Claude say the same is reassuring that it isn't simply a childish fear for her physical safety--she does not want to die again--but a sound tactical concern.
She trails him as he begins to look for appropriate substances to incapacitate the Gnosia.]
How will we deliver it? Getting up close for a safe injection seems too dangerous, but an arrow seems rather extreme as a delivery method.
They're trying to kill us. Even killing them wouldn't be too extreme, underneath these circumstances.
[ He doesn't want to. That he's planning on healing them and planning on poisoning them should, he thinks, be evidence enough for that fact. But if his back's against the wall and it's him or them, he won't hesitate before shoving a knife in any of their backs.
Well. Perhaps not any of them. But certainly most of them. Claude may have a fondness for many people here, but that doesn't translate to prioritizing their lives over his own. ]
An arrow's the best I've got. The chances of us being able to corner one in an enclosed enough space for airborne poisons to work are slim, and we'd be endangering ourselves in the process. Besides, very few people die from one arrow wound.
[ He picks up a stray arrow, twirls it between his fingers. ]
Getting it directly into their blood stream like this would be quickest, safest, and easiest to do at a distance. I think it's our best shot.
[Ethlyn nods. It's a better option than just killing them outright. She has all the things necessary to treat the wounds, at least--surgical tools, sutures, disinfectant, bandages.]
At least you're a good shot. [She sighs.] At a time like this we could use Brigid--she's the only archer I know who could rival you, thanks to the touch of the gods.
[Mind, Brigid probably would just kill all of the Gnosia to solve the problem. Ethlyn couldn't claim to have known her well, but she had come away with the distinct impression of a person who did not take the long way around to solving a problem.]
[ Don't worry, Ethlyn -- he won't veer too dramatically into sacrilege, considering the circumstances. But a part of him wonders that if one is giving true blessings by the gods, if they would even be able to reach them here. Their Crests have much more to do with bloodline than blessing, after all, and any true gift can be just as truly taken away. ]
It depends on the person. And on the poison. That's the tricky bit -- I need to try to make calculations on which one to use, and how much of it. I don't want to kill them, but I have no intention to die myself either.
[ He drums his fingers against the shaft of his arrow. ]
For some poisons, it could take up to a few hours. For others, the more severe ones, a matter of minutes.
[ It's dangerous. And Ethlyn would need to heal their poisoning and that damned Gnosia business. It's asking a lot of her. ]
...A few hours is too long. [She has to drag the words out of her mouth. A few minutes? Then it's a matter of evasion and containment. And even then it's an incredible risk. But hours... so much can be done in hours.] I would guess that to poison someone with that kind of precision, you would need an accurate guess of their body weight, their overall constitution, and any complicating health factors, like you do with medicine.
[She has records in the clinic. It's not how she wants to use them--she takes the trust and confidence people have in her seriously--but this is life-and-death.]
That's right. It's a science. And one that I've got down pretty well, but there's no observations that can be a replacement for actual knowledge of their medical histories. You may well think you're doing nothing but sending them to sleep for a spell, only to realize they're deathly sensitive to the honey you slipped the poison in.
[ He shrugs, looking a little more careless than he actually feels. ]
But between your healing powers and my own, we'll be able to help them recover far, far more easily than we're able to raise the dead of their victims. We may be between a rock and a hard place, but your task as a healer remains the same, right? We minimize harm, minimize the victims, and deal with the rest as it comes.
And speaking personally -- I'd rather be cut down than to take an innocent's life. I have no doubt many of the victims of this plague would feel the same way.
[Ethlyn nods. As the person who knows so much about so many people's health, she can help with that. The point about allergies makes her grimace a little, thinking about Jim and his battery of allergies. Ethlyn hopes he hasn't been infected, because she doesn't want to have to tell Claude that he could be taken down by some of the most seemingly-innocuous foodstuffs available.]
Yes... it's like after a battle, where there are so many wounded you have to decide who can survive with the limited time and resources you have right then. [She doesn't like it, but who does? That doesn't make it any less necessary.] ...I can help you with the medical histories. I'm sure most people here agree with you. I certainly would rather someone knock me out than let me become an indiscriminate killer.
[And here she had thought that death was the worst that could happen to a person.]
[ Claude nods approvingly at her. He doesn't take for granted how difficult this is for her, how seriously Ethlyn takes her role as a healer, the things she's been told in confidence, the things that she strives so desperately to keep up -- but dire times call for dire measures. ]
We'll take them down, one at a time. Eventually, we'll have enough people on our side to help take the rest down too. Right now is the hard part. [ He claps Ethlyn on the shoulder. ] It will all get easier from here. All we need is to get to work.
[Ethlyn manages a faint smile when he claps her on the shoulder. It makes her think of her brother and her husband--thow good they were at keeping their spirits up and instilling heart into their troops. Claude's army at home has a good leader.]
You're not going to like hearing this. But if this does ever happen to me, don't hesitate to cut me down. My mind is my best asset, and the idea of it out of my control being used to hurt others -- it's an unappealing thought.
[ He's making light of it, as he always does. But he's dead serious. He's seen too many people deformed by their lust for the Relics back home, the way that they're twisted and deformed, barely a person left inside at all anymore. He feels no guilt for cutting them down, knowing damn well that he's doing them a favour.
But it's always terrified him. It's the one thing he can't bargain his way out of. Once you're gone, you're gone. The only thing that's left is death and destruction. ]
[...This is why it's dangerous to be impulsive and trusting.
Yet Ethlyn understands completely. As a healer, she knows so much about the human body, especially after over a year of intense self-education. She's already been thinking about how to weaponize people's medical conditions if necessary... and if her mind was overtaken and warped the way the Gnosia are, well. She would prefer a swift stroke to the heart herself.
So she's stunned. But not entirely. It's just the mental image of having to drive a sword through her closest friend.]
...Very well. [...] That is much to ask, but... I would ask the same.
[It takes a deep breath after she says that. She has already died once. She does not wish for it to happen again. But it's better than becoming an instrument of corruption and death.]
I know you would. I'd have done it without you having to ask me.
[ It sounds a cruelty, to say that you'd be ready to kill a dear friend -- but Claude means it in the most honourable way he could. He knows Ethlyn. He knows she takes pride in her role as a healer, knows that everything she did was to save the lives of her people, knows that she loves others fiercely and will only kill if absolutely necessary. It often is, in a world at war, but that makes her moral code all the more precious for it. ]
But I don't think it will come to that. Not now, and not ever. And certainly not with a cure in sight. [ He gives her a small smile, a paltry attempt to lift the grim mood. ] Believe me when I say it would be my last resort, as I know it would be yours. Now! [ He claps his hands. ] Being that you believe we can heal these poor people, I think it's high time we get to work.
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expiationlogs2024-07-15 08:13 am
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[ He glances at her, and amends: ] I'm not saying that because I'm fond of you and would prefer you stay out of the line of fire though that is, of course, true. I'm saying that because if you have the capacity to heal them, we're going to need you. For everyone's sake.
[ He begins to walk around the room, shuffling through jars and potions and all sorts of foul smelling things, taking stock of what he has, what can be used. ]
If it were me underneath that spell, I'd more gladly die than to hurt innocents. But I would vastly prefer that someone just poison me and heal my mind afterwards, [ he says with a wry smile. ] That's not always the case. This isn't so terribly unlike something back home, and those, we just killed. There was no other choice.
no subject
It doesn't sound like there's a margin for error. If I put a foot wrong out there...
[She'll die again.
It dogs at her sense of cowardice. It's not a sense she thought she would ever need to be troubled by, but after her failure to reclaim her memories as she ought to have, the fear of it lurks at the edge of her thoughts, making her question herself. To hear Claude say the same is reassuring that it isn't simply a childish fear for her physical safety--she does not want to die again--but a sound tactical concern.
She trails him as he begins to look for appropriate substances to incapacitate the Gnosia.]
How will we deliver it? Getting up close for a safe injection seems too dangerous, but an arrow seems rather extreme as a delivery method.
no subject
[ He doesn't want to. That he's planning on healing them and planning on poisoning them should, he thinks, be evidence enough for that fact. But if his back's against the wall and it's him or them, he won't hesitate before shoving a knife in any of their backs.
Well. Perhaps not any of them. But certainly most of them. Claude may have a fondness for many people here, but that doesn't translate to prioritizing their lives over his own. ]
An arrow's the best I've got. The chances of us being able to corner one in an enclosed enough space for airborne poisons to work are slim, and we'd be endangering ourselves in the process. Besides, very few people die from one arrow wound.
[ He picks up a stray arrow, twirls it between his fingers. ]
Getting it directly into their blood stream like this would be quickest, safest, and easiest to do at a distance. I think it's our best shot.
no subject
At least you're a good shot. [She sighs.] At a time like this we could use Brigid--she's the only archer I know who could rival you, thanks to the touch of the gods.
[Mind, Brigid probably would just kill all of the Gnosia to solve the problem. Ethlyn couldn't claim to have known her well, but she had come away with the distinct impression of a person who did not take the long way around to solving a problem.]
How long will it take for it to knock them down?
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[ Don't worry, Ethlyn -- he won't veer too dramatically into sacrilege, considering the circumstances. But a part of him wonders that if one is giving true blessings by the gods, if they would even be able to reach them here. Their Crests have much more to do with bloodline than blessing, after all, and any true gift can be just as truly taken away. ]
It depends on the person. And on the poison. That's the tricky bit -- I need to try to make calculations on which one to use, and how much of it. I don't want to kill them, but I have no intention to die myself either.
[ He drums his fingers against the shaft of his arrow. ]
For some poisons, it could take up to a few hours. For others, the more severe ones, a matter of minutes.
[ It's dangerous. And Ethlyn would need to heal their poisoning and that damned Gnosia business. It's asking a lot of her. ]
no subject
[She has records in the clinic. It's not how she wants to use them--she takes the trust and confidence people have in her seriously--but this is life-and-death.]
no subject
[ He shrugs, looking a little more careless than he actually feels. ]
But between your healing powers and my own, we'll be able to help them recover far, far more easily than we're able to raise the dead of their victims. We may be between a rock and a hard place, but your task as a healer remains the same, right? We minimize harm, minimize the victims, and deal with the rest as it comes.
And speaking personally -- I'd rather be cut down than to take an innocent's life. I have no doubt many of the victims of this plague would feel the same way.
no subject
Yes... it's like after a battle, where there are so many wounded you have to decide who can survive with the limited time and resources you have right then. [She doesn't like it, but who does? That doesn't make it any less necessary.] ...I can help you with the medical histories. I'm sure most people here agree with you. I certainly would rather someone knock me out than let me become an indiscriminate killer.
[And here she had thought that death was the worst that could happen to a person.]
no subject
[ Claude nods approvingly at her. He doesn't take for granted how difficult this is for her, how seriously Ethlyn takes her role as a healer, the things she's been told in confidence, the things that she strives so desperately to keep up -- but dire times call for dire measures. ]
We'll take them down, one at a time. Eventually, we'll have enough people on our side to help take the rest down too. Right now is the hard part. [ He claps Ethlyn on the shoulder. ] It will all get easier from here. All we need is to get to work.
[ He pauses. ]
I would like to ask something of you, though.
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Of course. You have only to ask.
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[ He's making light of it, as he always does. But he's dead serious. He's seen too many people deformed by their lust for the Relics back home, the way that they're twisted and deformed, barely a person left inside at all anymore. He feels no guilt for cutting them down, knowing damn well that he's doing them a favour.
But it's always terrified him. It's the one thing he can't bargain his way out of. Once you're gone, you're gone. The only thing that's left is death and destruction. ]
no subject
Yet Ethlyn understands completely. As a healer, she knows so much about the human body, especially after over a year of intense self-education. She's already been thinking about how to weaponize people's medical conditions if necessary... and if her mind was overtaken and warped the way the Gnosia are, well. She would prefer a swift stroke to the heart herself.
So she's stunned. But not entirely. It's just the mental image of having to drive a sword through her closest friend.]
...Very well. [...] That is much to ask, but... I would ask the same.
[It takes a deep breath after she says that. She has already died once. She does not wish for it to happen again. But it's better than becoming an instrument of corruption and death.]
no subject
[ It sounds a cruelty, to say that you'd be ready to kill a dear friend -- but Claude means it in the most honourable way he could. He knows Ethlyn. He knows she takes pride in her role as a healer, knows that everything she did was to save the lives of her people, knows that she loves others fiercely and will only kill if absolutely necessary. It often is, in a world at war, but that makes her moral code all the more precious for it. ]
But I don't think it will come to that. Not now, and not ever. And certainly not with a cure in sight. [ He gives her a small smile, a paltry attempt to lift the grim mood. ] Believe me when I say it would be my last resort, as I know it would be yours. Now! [ He claps his hands. ] Being that you believe we can heal these poor people, I think it's high time we get to work.