[ The sudden reminder of how obviously Toph had shown her sentimental side with this statue of Katara brings her to a sudden halt, flustered.
Overly assertive to make up for it, she insists, ] Okay, but if Katara shows up here and you tell her I got all mushy about her, I'll make you regret it. Got it?
[ Welcome to real friendship with Toph: casual threats that she absolutely means. ]
Oh, don't worry. I'm sure she knows how you feel about her... she won't need me to tell her about it. [So reassuring.] I can only imagine how inventive you'll get about your revenge if I let her know about this conversation.
Right, right. [Ethlyn raises her hands--she keeps doing that, doesn't she, even though it's useless for Toph.] I won't tell anyone who doesn't know, either. You have a reputation to maintain.
[Those words could be sarcastic, but they aren't. Thrust into the adult world at a young age, there are many ways to hide your own weaknesses... but the fact is, you do have to hide them.]
Twelve is no time to show everyone all your vulnerabilities. You just chose a more... aggressive method than I did.
[ Wow, Toph is totally sensitive enough to feel body language like hands being raised -- this is why she doesn't need a mom!!
Anyway, this further explanation causes Toph to raise her eyebrows, surprised and impressed at the acuity Ethlyn shows in the response. ] I'm thirteen, for the record, and glad to hear you aren't all sweetness and care packages. Why did you have to hide your sore spots?
[ It occurs to her belatedly, in the way of children everywhere, that she actually knows very little about Ethlyn as a person and about her background. ]
My family was one of high social standing. That meant we had rivals--enemies, rather. [At thirteen, Ethlyn hadn't comprehended the depths of their hatred for her father, but what she had known was hard enough.] When I stepped into my mother's place as a representative for the family, they had no scruple about seeing me as our weak point.
[Those had been hard days. She had the benefit of being trained in etiquette already by her mother and her tutors. But those lessons hadn't prepared her for women and men who behaved like snakes, just waiting for her to stumble into range of their venom.
Of course, there was nothing unacceptable about sly acid comments about clothing or cleanliness or the amount of time it had taken for the Chalphys to appear at social functions again. But to get angry--visibly angry--or even to refute such comments directly? Criminal.]
If you let yourself be provoked, it doesn't just reflect on you, but your whole house. And then the insults get worse because now your mother and father failed to raise you properly, which is worse, and you still have to not get provoked, and then you have to keep your older brother from shouting and making it all worse. It's worse than trying to ride through marshlands.
[ She can't really be surprised to hear that Ethlyn is from the snake pit that is noble politics given her overall demeanor, and it makes Toph grimace in sympathy and distaste. She has absolutely never looked back on her decision to abandon the Beifong fortune and status. She misses her parents, but she's rather scrape her own way along than bow to useless twats who don't deserve it.
Living with it takes a kind of strength she respects, however, and she knows not everyone can afford to just ditch their whole privileged life without serious consequences. Like Zuko. If he wanted to abdicate and run off, the whole world would fall into war again. Probably it isn't that serious for Ethlyn, but dire personal consequences are still dire. ]
I know exactly what you're talking about, [ Toph answers in a dark tone. ] I can't stand all the verbal dancing around in 'high society'. [ She sounds openly scornful. ]
I left all that behind -- it was making me crazy. ... But I know not everyone can. I have no clue how you've stayed this genuinely nice if you've been putting up with that for years.
[ She has no problem whatsoever calling out strength when she sees it. It isn't threatening to Toph to acknowledge someone else excelling, especially in an area she knows she herself doesn't. Sure, she can put up the front long enough to sneak into a party, but living that way for years on end, authentically?
[Ah, so Toph is a runaway. Like Tailtiu, but with a much different attitude--while Tailtiu was defiantly flippant, Toph is defiantly... defiant.
It's still shocking that Toph is so young to have taken that step, though. Even with her impressive earthbending skills, to set off into the unknown like that must have been daunting.]
...I am very lucky in the family that I have. [Not everyone is.] My father was never as concerned with his social standing than he was for our own happiness and well-being. If we were puinished, it was for doing something that was actually wrong, not because we hadn't been sufficiently charming or witty or spoken too directly.
Even after the most taxing trial on my patience, I knew that I would go home and vent all my frustrations with my older brother, or outrun them riding alongside my father. And later on I did those things with my husband. But I know that it was far from common.
[Lucky again, because when it was time for Ethlyn to think about marriage, Lord Byron's first thought had been for his daughter's happiness. That she was happy with the prince of an allied country was more a stroke of luck than a real consideration.]
[ It actually was daunting, in that it hadn't even occurred to her as a serious option until Aang essentially begged for her help. That appealed to her pride, but it also brought into sharp focus how untenable it was to keep living the way she had been. Where was that going to go? Marriage, like Ethlyn, but in her case probably to someone who'd never respect her for who she is?
Toph was fortunate to have fallen into a different kind of family, one she trusts absolutely and one that accepts her the same way. So she has a whole support system now -- even if it isn't her parents. As for the current conversation, Toph doesn't really feel the need to compare their situations any further. It's not a contest, and she's glad for Ethlyn that she had what sounds like the best possible version of that scenario. ]
Yeah, that'll make a big difference, [ she agrees. ] Getting to go home and be yourself. That's what Katara and Aang and everyone else are for me. Whatever happens, we know we've got each other's backs.
... When we're in the same place, anyway.
[ See, she does know how to have an emotion out loud. ]
[That's what home is, when all is said and done. It doesn't mean where your blood kin reside, not always. That's why Tailtiu left, Ethlyn thinks. Now she wishes she and her sparking cheerfulness were here, just so she and Toph could know each other.
...It would be nice to see any of them here. Not only because of what she's sure happened to most of them.]
Yes... Even when you're far away from a bed and surrounded by people who would attack you as soon as they see you. [Despite the wistfulness, Ethlyn smiles.] I hope that one day I can meet yours, and you can meet mine.
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expiationlogs2024-04-14 10:44 pm
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[She steps away from Katara. Maybe one day she'll get to meet her.]
I don't know what you plan to do with all the trash statues, but you should keep this one up.
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Overly assertive to make up for it, she insists, ] Okay, but if Katara shows up here and you tell her I got all mushy about her, I'll make you regret it. Got it?
[ Welcome to real friendship with Toph: casual threats that she absolutely means. ]
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Oh, don't worry. I'm sure she knows how you feel about her... she won't need me to tell her about it. [So reassuring.] I can only imagine how inventive you'll get about your revenge if I let her know about this conversation.
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[ god, Ethlyn, you just still don't get it ]
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[Those words could be sarcastic, but they aren't. Thrust into the adult world at a young age, there are many ways to hide your own weaknesses... but the fact is, you do have to hide them.]
Twelve is no time to show everyone all your vulnerabilities. You just chose a more... aggressive method than I did.
no subject
Anyway, this further explanation causes Toph to raise her eyebrows, surprised and impressed at the acuity Ethlyn shows in the response. ] I'm thirteen, for the record, and glad to hear you aren't all sweetness and care packages. Why did you have to hide your sore spots?
[ It occurs to her belatedly, in the way of children everywhere, that she actually knows very little about Ethlyn as a person and about her background. ]
no subject
[Those had been hard days. She had the benefit of being trained in etiquette already by her mother and her tutors. But those lessons hadn't prepared her for women and men who behaved like snakes, just waiting for her to stumble into range of their venom.
Of course, there was nothing unacceptable about sly acid comments about clothing or cleanliness or the amount of time it had taken for the Chalphys to appear at social functions again. But to get angry--visibly angry--or even to refute such comments directly? Criminal.]
If you let yourself be provoked, it doesn't just reflect on you, but your whole house. And then the insults get worse because now your mother and father failed to raise you properly, which is worse, and you still have to not get provoked, and then you have to keep your older brother from shouting and making it all worse. It's worse than trying to ride through marshlands.
no subject
Living with it takes a kind of strength she respects, however, and she knows not everyone can afford to just ditch their whole privileged life without serious consequences. Like Zuko. If he wanted to abdicate and run off, the whole world would fall into war again. Probably it isn't that serious for Ethlyn, but dire personal consequences are still dire. ]
I know exactly what you're talking about, [ Toph answers in a dark tone. ] I can't stand all the verbal dancing around in 'high society'. [ She sounds openly scornful. ]
I left all that behind -- it was making me crazy. ... But I know not everyone can. I have no clue how you've stayed this genuinely nice if you've been putting up with that for years.
[ She has no problem whatsoever calling out strength when she sees it. It isn't threatening to Toph to acknowledge someone else excelling, especially in an area she knows she herself doesn't. Sure, she can put up the front long enough to sneak into a party, but living that way for years on end, authentically?
No way. ]
no subject
It's still shocking that Toph is so young to have taken that step, though. Even with her impressive earthbending skills, to set off into the unknown like that must have been daunting.]
...I am very lucky in the family that I have. [Not everyone is.] My father was never as concerned with his social standing than he was for our own happiness and well-being. If we were puinished, it was for doing something that was actually wrong, not because we hadn't been sufficiently charming or witty or spoken too directly.
Even after the most taxing trial on my patience, I knew that I would go home and vent all my frustrations with my older brother, or outrun them riding alongside my father. And later on I did those things with my husband. But I know that it was far from common.
[Lucky again, because when it was time for Ethlyn to think about marriage, Lord Byron's first thought had been for his daughter's happiness. That she was happy with the prince of an allied country was more a stroke of luck than a real consideration.]
no subject
Toph was fortunate to have fallen into a different kind of family, one she trusts absolutely and one that accepts her the same way. So she has a whole support system now -- even if it isn't her parents. As for the current conversation, Toph doesn't really feel the need to compare their situations any further. It's not a contest, and she's glad for Ethlyn that she had what sounds like the best possible version of that scenario. ]
Yeah, that'll make a big difference, [ she agrees. ] Getting to go home and be yourself. That's what Katara and Aang and everyone else are for me. Whatever happens, we know we've got each other's backs.
... When we're in the same place, anyway.
[ See, she does know how to have an emotion out loud. ]
no subject
...It would be nice to see any of them here. Not only because of what she's sure happened to most of them.]
Yes... Even when you're far away from a bed and surrounded by people who would attack you as soon as they see you. [Despite the wistfulness, Ethlyn smiles.] I hope that one day I can meet yours, and you can meet mine.