TEST DRIVE MEME #8

[expiationmods]

Test Drive Meme #8

Welcome to Expiation, a pan-fandom adventure game with elements of fantasy, science fiction, and some subtle horror.

TDM top-levels are open to all, whether you are already in-game or not. New characters, please put TDM in your subject header so we’ll know you’re trying things out! You can also put your top-level in the TDM DIRECTORY at the bottom of the post. New folks are welcome and encouraged to use TDM threads as samples in their application. Current players may use TDM threads as part of their AC proofs.

April's TDM is forward-dated to the end of Gogol, Dara, and Seimei's player plot on April 20th.

You can view our CALENDAR to keep important dates in mind. RESERVES open on April 20 and APPLICATIONS will open on April 23 After this, applications will next open in June 2024.

NEW FOR APRIL 2024: there is now a top level for everyone to post their TDM top levels into! This is for new characters only. Thank you!

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Arrival

You remember a room of blinding white light—so bright that you couldn't make out any details. You heard voices, speaking in muffled tones. It sounded an awful lot like they were talking about you. You were just on the verge of figuring out what they’re saying, you were so close...but what happened after that?

Ah–that's right. You fell into blackness.

New characters are most likely to wake in one of the following locations:

THE DOCKS
You wake to the gentle sound of waves, your body rocking with the movement of the water. Wait—water? Since when was there water beneath you?

Since now, apparently. You appear to be in the lower rooms of a boat…and you might not be alone. There are several of these crafts in the harbor, ranging from larger cruising vessels to small sailboats. The one thing they all have in common is this: they are all half-built, as if someone realized very recently that there is a whole ocean to explore. Wonder where they might be going? Either way, you’d better get out of here, before the construction crew finds you and brands you as a stowaway.

ENTERTAINMENT DISTRICT
When you come to, the first thing you hear is the commotion of distant voices and running feet. You feel a warm light on your face…it’s too bright to look at directly, so when you open your eyes, you have to look away. It’s probably for the best. Those stage lights can’t be good for your eyes.

… Stage lights?

That’s right, you seem to be just offstage in an entertainment venue. Someone is fussing with you, powdering your face with some last-minute touch-up makeup, vaguely coaching you on. “You’ll be great! Just get out there and have fun!”

With little room to argue or ask questions, you are immediately shoved out on stage, and find yourself in front of a sold-out crowd. What you find on the stage to help you perform is up to you: a microphone, musical instruments, magician’s tools, a full-blown play, the sky’s the limit.

Break a leg…?

CITY CENTER
“These new statues are so lifelike!” Click.
“I wonder which artist installed all of this? It’s almost eerie, isn’t it?”
“I feel like they could move at any second!” Click click.

You wake in a garden. Not just in a garden—amongst the flowers, almost as if you’re an installed piece of artwork. Are you alone, or posed with someone else? Up to you. You may even find yourself entwined with vines, half-buried in the ground, or subtly hidden beneath a large bush. A few hapless locals stand in front of you, taking pictures. Do they really believe you’re a statue? They’re in for a rude awakening whenever you finally move…

Well. Better dig yourself out of here and figure out what’s going on.

However you awaken, the next time you’re able to stand still and take in your surroundings, you’re approached by a small mechanical creature, which reveals a handheld tablet with a rolled-up parchment within it. Booting up the tablet for the first time brings you the following message:

WELCOME, CHOSEN.
WE ARE SO GLAD YOU ARE HERE.

So…now what?

These new familiar streets

The unexpected expansion of Aldrip means that there's suddenly a vast uptick in things to do. The locals don't seem to find any of this unusual or surprising at all, but the Chosen seem to remember that Aldrip wasn't always like this...how unusual! Well, whatever the case, the city is abuzz with activity…and wildlife, apparently. Thanks to some recent events, there seems to be a surplus of poisonous snakes slithering haplessly through the city, as well as, perhaps, a few lingering pockets of miasma. Best to watch your step…

i. This smells like a sidequest
Businesses and individuals all over town will be giving out quests ranging in size, scope, and request. Any of these will net you a prize from the right requestor. These prizes are mostly just silly little knick knacks, and they don’t seem to have any value, but the locals are adamant that they are quite important! At the same time, some locals may offer more useful rewards, such as money, clothing, food, or even a month’s rent at the local inn, especially for newcomers. Either way, you might have to team up to complete some of these challenges. Grab a partner!

Quests and requests can include, but are not limited to, ideas such as:

A local art collector looking for striking photographs of local flora and fauna
The neighborhood food cart owner on the hunt for new and interesting ingredients and recipes
Your neighbor’s search for their missing cat
Requests to clear monsters out of certain areas
Scavenger hunts to find local landmarks, such as murals on the side of buildings, a specific statue, or a hole-in-the-wall business

You're free to use your imagination, the setting, and local NPCs to come up with whatever ideas your heart desires.

ii. Should’ve waited for the patch
This sudden change is going fairly well, but it could be better. Some areas of town will be subject to something that seems like glitches. These effects could range from things going missing or suddenly changing (your favorite lipstick just changed from red to blue?? how odd!) to streets and doorways going into places they logically shouldn’t go to. Your front door isn’t supposed to be at the end of the dock, is it? Better watch your step, because strange things seem to be afoot.

Day and night life

While it’s not an official festival by any means, the beginning of spring is the cherished start of the planting season for the farmers outside of Aldrip, and the entire city comes together to promote it! Chosen are encouraged to take part in the planting process if they desire, but there’s plenty more to do, for those who don’t have a green thumb. Flyers can be found all over town for various competitions, shows, businesses, and events. Just be careful—the city has grown rapidly in a short period of time, and that means crime rates have grown as well. It’s unwise to linger alone after dark. Who knows what someone may find down a dark alleyway…or who knows, maybe they should be more afraid of you.

iii. Iron Chef: Aldrip
Fire up those pots and pans! The highlight of the town center is a huge cooking competition, where locals and Chosen alike are encouraged to bring their finest culinary skills to the table and create a spectacular dish. Those who would rather cheer from the sidelines, or even act as judges for the competition, are encouraged to do so as well. Anyone may enter—and we do mean anyone, so judge at your own risk.

iv. This is not Aldrip’s Best Friends Race
Many local businesses in the Commercial and Entertainment Districts are putting on all sorts of shows and competitions: talent contests, arm-wrestling competitions, fashion shows, dance exhibitions, the sky's the limit. Local business owners will tempt the Chosen into participating by offering rewards: free items, the option to keep costumes they put you in, trophies, all manner of comforts that could entice wary newcomers into volunteering.

Chosen who own or work at local businesses are also encouraged to participate by starting their own shows or contests. They’ll be rewarded with an uptick in business and free advertisement.

The Events Center will be hosting a lavish and well-advertised drag show and competition, and some locals will encourage participation from Chosen of all genders. Most of them will lay off if the Chosen are really not interested (they’re not putting their lives at risk for this!) but some of the more determined and charismatic ones might not take “no” for an answer.

Wildcard

Just because it’s not in the prompts doesn’t mean it can’t happen. We encourage you to look at our new setting page for Aldrip, as well as the world map. Anything that looks interesting there is fair game, so have fun with it!

♡

Comments

i

[bonobos]

[ the city's alive, bursting at the seams with joy and fervor. in the strangest of ways, he's comforted by all of the bustle -- it's an apt distraction from reality.

he doesn't quite remember how he's gotten here either; probably some stupid spur decision he made. but the woman beside him is clearly tense with anxiety, and he realizes then in that moment that she's a new face entirely. clad in a stark white suit, hair slicked back, sha-ming leans in to respond in a whisper: ]

Lemme be real with you... I never know a damn thing that's going on in this city. Shit's crazy. Just go along with it, 'mmkay? I'll start us off.

[ and then he clears his throat before speaking into the mic; his voice reverberates against the walls and goddamn, does he hate that. ]

Hey guys. Hope you didn't pay too much for those tickets cause honestly, I got nothin' to give!

[ the audience wheezes out a soft laugh. alright, good start. ]

Who's ready for Aldrip's first ever comedy show!?

[ a trombone in the background sounds, paired with a badum tshhh. applause erupts in response. ]

Alright, lemme give you some background. Normally, I'd just spew a bunch of bullshit, but I got sentenced earlier this month... ME! Can you believe it? I look like an upstanding guy, right? Your average Joe Schmo'. [ another chorus of laughter. ] Yeah, yeah, laugh it up losers, but you know... it ain't funny! They told me I gotta be more honest now, so like, okay, we're all gonna be pals after today! And be nice to my friend right here, if you're mean to her I'm gonna throw this mic at someone! And I got good aim too so I could probably take out a whole eye!

[ the laughter only increases in volume. with a wolfish grin, he bows to the woman before him. ]

Alright missus, hit us with the funniest thing that's ever happened to ya. No incorrect answers!

[saults]

[ it's not like she hasn't stumbled into her share of crazy. midgar itself had been primed for the biggest absurdities, especially whenever she crossed over from sector 7 into 6, where wall market's bustle for entertainment had forced her to play along into some of the more embarrassing and even grotesque scenarios. maybe being torn in front of an audience isn't as terrible as being personally judged by don corneo's heinous tastes, but it's still unnerving when she doesn't know how she got herself here in the first place.

the man's attempt at reassurance only goes so far, not quite easing the urges to simply run off the stage in this very moment, especially when not seeing any familiar faces within visual distance is making her start to worry about her friends alongside her own predicament. ]

Huh? [ she finally reacts at the mention of "comedy show" since ... wait, she's not supposed to actually participate in this, is she?

at the very least, his egging on the audience seems to keeps them entertained, even if tifa herself hasn't found the urge to laugh, fingers curling into the fabric of her dress at her hips, trying to glance off the stage to see if she could find an opening for an exist. he's keeping them distracted enough and he seems more of a natural for this than she'd ever be —

at least until he brings the attention back to her. ]

What — me? [ she blinks, as ruby eyes catch past the lights to see the way all eyes seem to suddenly zoom in on her, silence striking the air save for a man in the back briefly coughing as they await her story. ] Oh, I'm ...

[ think, tifa, think. ]

So, um, this one time I stepped into a bar and I hear someone say, "Your hair looks amazing. Did you style it yourself?" But when I looked around, there wasn't anyone there. About a minute later, I heard someone else, they said, "I love your style. It's like a model walked in." And again, there wasn't anyone around. [ the silence remains, as if everyone seems to be waiting for her to get to the point, so she takes a breath and continues, ] So, finally, I just look to the bartender and I asked if she heard that, and the bartender says, "It's the peanuts. They're complimentary."

[ no, not a real story that happened to her, but one of the many jokes she, as a bartender herself, has heard from across the bar, so she gives an awkward smile, waiting for the reaction — until the audience finally blurts out into easy loud laughter. ]

[bonobos]

[ he waits patiently for the punchline — this one didn’t seem to be much of a joker, and that was fine; not everyone was equipped for the lifestyle of a court jester. but for the meantime, he intends on making a fulltime career of hyping her up, so his eyes are attentive, the smile on his face having yet to falter.

and then she gets to the punchline, and you know, it’s an innocuous joke, something you’d pawn off someone else and keep for later in case you needed a light chuckle. but he makes a whole show of it and busts out into a fit of laughter alongside the audience. the trombone sounds once more and the joke is punctuated with another rattle of the drum. ]

Peanuts. Peanuts! That’s good! Damn, she’s funny, right? [ he questions the audience. and then more gravely: ] Right?

[ applause, cheer, low whistles all around. ]

Now that’s what I’m talkin’ about. [ another grin, his sharpened canines poking out. ] Okay, okay, here’s mine.

So yanno what I said about my sentencing? And how it’s makin’ me be more honest? Okay, well, I’m gonna take you guys back to my childhood. So like… monkeys. We all know ‘em, right? Thing is, I grew up around ‘em. And they weren’t normal monkeys, they were super smart. Smarter than everyone in this room combined! I mean, why else would you pay for this shit.

[ another chorus of laughter. damn, these people were easy. ]

So it’s 10 years ago, and I’m walkin’ around on the shithole of a planet I call home. I was feelin’ pretty insecure, as kids do, cause I was useless to all of my monkey bros. Thankfully, I’ve come to embrace how useless I am as an adult — means nobody can ask me for shit! [ cue audience laughter. ] But yeah, I wandered into some cave like a complete dumbass. Couldn’t see a damn thing. All of a sudden I hear this growl, like— grrrraaghhh, never heard that shit in my liiiife. So like, I turn around cause yanno, dumbass kid and all…

And yeah. There was this 13 foot tall behemoth looking asshole with tusks AND claws and AND bad breath for days. So like… naturally, it tried to kill me. And to its credit, it was my fault — I was in territory I shouldn’t have been in! But suddenly, my monkey bros showed up and start throwing rocks to distract that motherfucker. And they all go “hey, Ming, are you crazy!?” And I got big fat tears running down my face, can’t even TALK, before they carry me out like I’m the last piece of cake at the buffet.

So what’s the punchline? [ dead silence. ] Don’t have friends, they’ll all die anyways.

[ it’s dead quiet. someone coughs. and then suddenly, the audience swells into a symphony of unabashed laughter.

sha-ming coughs. his eyes shift in saccades toward the women, before he then whispers: ]

We have 30 minutes left, just work with me. These morons’ll laugh at anything.

[ it’s fine, the payout would make it worth it. the spotlight shifts back to the woman adjacent to him, swathing her in the glow of the stage. ]

Back to the woman of the evening! What’s the most important lesson life’s taught you? Hope it’s better than mine!