001; open;

[aintyourdad]

Who: Joel and YOU?!
Where: Outskirts of Aldrip
What: Joel isn't pleased to be here. He's especially not pleased that someone knows a lot about him, and has it all written on a piece of paper.
Warnings: Nothing yet, aside from Joel's general assholishness.

[ Joel approaches the town carefully. It's long, long habit - infected are dangerous, sure, but people are what you really need to watch out for. People are capable of anything.

And this town? It's way too fucking good to be true. It's just... there. Out in the open, no defenses, no lookouts, no patrols. He doesn't trust it. And he especially doesn't trust whoever left this piece of paper on him, with his personal information, and some kinda crime he's supposed to have committed. The first thing he needs to do is find somewhere reasonably safe, and the second thing? The second thing is to destroy this paper before someone else gets their hands on it.

Then he needs to find Ellie.

No one is armed. No one tries to attack him, or shouts for FEDRA, or anything. Not even on the outskirts of the town, where he'd expect people to be particularly wary. Somehow, despite the tension in his shoulders, despite the glares he shoots at everyone in his vicinity, someone gets him to some sort of... inn, or something? What the fuck.

He finds a table near the back, with his back to a wall and all exits firmly in his sight lines. Then he pulls the paper out, unrolls it, looks at it a moment. Crumples it up in his hand, then goes to rip it up. Except, he can't. A line of frustration appears on his brow as he tries to tear at it, with his hands, his teeth, he even pulls out a blade at one point and tries to cut it.

The only thing he gets out of the exercise is a paper cut. ]

What the fuck is goin' on here.

[ His voice is incredulous (and also Texan). ]

Comments

[starguy]

Hey, I said poison, not drug. But if you need me to test your drink to prove it's clean, I can do that! I got an iron stomach, you should see the kind of stuff we eat in space.

[ Hint: noodles are not noodles in space. They are grody space fritters that are somehow both crunchy and chewy and seriously how is Peter alive.

But Peter takes his victory and even pumps his fist a bit. Hell yeah, he scored drinks with the cool cynical guy who he is definitely going to become friends with, one way or another. ]

I'll be back with that whiskey. Just gimme a tick.

[ Sure enough, he goes up to the bar and orders two whiskeys. He's going to need to mop some floors tonight, but it's worth it.

He returns with two glasses—one on ice, and one neat. He might be obnoxious, but he likes having his bases covered. ]

Alright, take your pick.

[aintyourdad]

[ It's really just Joel being a doomer, as usual. Anyone who spends any amount of time with this guy is going to have to learn to ignore it, at least some of the time.

Of course, sometimes being a doomer saves his ass.

He claims the whiskey neat, because ice is for weenies. He even takes a relatively modest swallow, instead of just gulping it all down at once. ]

Eh. Not bad, I guess.

[starguy]

[ Good choice. The ice was definitely for Peter, whose preference for beer is going to embarrass him as soon as he takes a drink and has to cringe from the burn.

It's ok, Joel. Doomers are the ones who get to say "I told you so" when things go wrong. ]

Right? I don't know if this place has some connection to Earth or what, but I'm not complaining.

[ He does indeed take a sip, and take a pause, because oh whiskey is strong, and he hasn't had it in years. But the taste only spurs Peter on in his attempt to be annoying befriend Joel. ]

So, Joel. Do you want a boring icebreaker, or a fun one?

[ Peter is definitely going to go with the fun one, even if Joel refuses to engage. ]

[aintyourdad]

[ There's something close to a look of amusement on Joel's face as Peter's eyes clearly start to water over the strength of the drink. It's really not that strong, compared to the kind of thing Joel is used to - like he said, paint stripper. People make bathtub gin and sometimes it's strong enough to make a man go blind.

By comparison, this stuff tastes nice.

But then Peter has to go and ruin the moment, and Joel is scowling again. He should've known. Everything comes with a price. ]

Neither.

[ He can already tell that he is going to be ignored, however. ]

[starguy]

[ Sorry, Joel, Peter's nature is to talk too much and make people talk about their feelings. And if he can't do that, he'll still try with a smile on his face. ]

Two truths and a lie it is. Or hey, two lies and a truth if you want! I'll start.

[ He takes another pained sip of his whiskey, forcing that smile to remain on his face past the burn. ]

Okay, so. I'm a space prince, I once saved Mars from an alien takeover, and I have a daughter who's twelve.

[ He looks over at Joel, expectantly. ]

Can you guess which one's the lie?

[aintyourdad]

Jesus Christ, I don't know.

[ What the fuck. Joel does, in fact, swallow the rest of his drink now, because he needs it after that. ]

The first one.

[ He's not sure he believes any of it, so he just picked one at random. ]

[starguy]

[ Peter grins. He's soo good at this! But also he picked his wildest facts, so this tracks. ]

Nope! But I would've guessed that one too—I'm not exactly crown prince material. [ He takes another sip of his whiskey, still making the same pained face. Lightweight. ] My dad was Emperor of Spartax, though flark knows how he's doing now. Never actually met the guy.

[ It's a can of worms, and not one that he's drunk enough to go into, so he'll move right on. ]

The daughter thing is still kind of new, but it's nice that you thought I was a dad. Her name's Nikki, she's a great kid. Real firecracker.

[ And not just because she has flaming hair, he's gonna spare Joel and leave that part out. ]

We're not related, but you know. [ He shrugs. ] Her mom and I met on Mercury—which is the planet I helped save, not Mars.

[ Don't worry Joel, it'll be your turn next. ]

[aintyourdad]

[ Joel just kind of... lets Peter ramble! He'd just as soon not know any of that (especially the bits about his daughter, because of course this asshole has a daughter, the universe hates Joel so why not?), but he just... sits there. Doesn't really react.

It actually takes him a moment to recall that he's probably expected to have some kind of reaction to all that, and so he just... ]

Well. Okay then.

[ That's all he's got. ]

[starguy]

[ Joel's lack of a reaction does not deter Peter. I mean, is he a little disappointed that he isn't becoming fast friends with this guy? Sure. But that's never stopped him before. In fact, it only spurs him on.

Challenge accepted, Joel. Peter is going to be so obnoxious. His smile will not crack. ]

So, your turn! Two truths and a lie, go.

[aintyourdad]

[ He had to know this was coming. Best just get it over with as soon as possible - this is clearly a guy who will sit here and argue about it until he either relents or storms off.

So he decides to play the game, but in the worst way possible. ]

My name's Joel, I'm from Texas, and I'm the president of the United States.

[starguy]

[ Joel may have picked the worst answers, but he did follow the rules, so that's still a win in Peter's book! Peter responds with mock aplomb. ]

Mr. President! I had no idea you were stuck here with the rest of us.

[ Peter grins, obviously facetious. ]

Hey, but you told me you're from Texas, that's something I didn't know before! You're not so bad at this, Joel.

[ See? Fun. ]

[aintyourdad]

Good for you.

[ The Texas thing is usually pretty obvious, he never lost his twang, even though he hasn't been back there in almost twenty years. Whatever. This is a space guy, he probably doesn't even know where Texas is. ]

Thanks for the drink.

[ He's just gonna... try to get up? Can he do that? Has he sufficiently played Quill's game? ]

[starguy]

[ Peter, enjoying his drink as you do, does not see this coming.

I mean, he should, but he's mostly pleased with himself for getting to share beers with his new buddy Joel. ]

Yeah, I was born in Missouri, but I haven't been back in ages.

[ Yep, Joel is getting up. He's already up. Peter is losing this one! He reaches up try and stop him. ]

Hey, wait—come on, dude!

[ Begging is not cool, dude. Peter is going to lose this one. Them's the breaks though, you win some you lose some! ]

[aintyourdad]

[ Joel sighs, and pauses, because really, the begging is just so pathetic. ]

Look, I appreciate the drink, but I'm not here for your entertainment. I'm sure you can find someone who'll enjoy your chit-chat more'n me.

[starguy]

[ He's a pathetic loser at times, it's a character flaw. But Peter is stubborn as hell, too, so he won't let something like dignity stop him just yet. ]

Aw, c'mon. I'm not looking for entertainment, I was just trying to break the ice! Or, you know, not talk about stuff that's totally depressing.

[ He is very bad at talking about things that are depressing, if that wasn't obvious. ]

We can, uh, sit here and drink in silence if that's really more your speed.

[ Will Peter actually be able to maintain that silence? Now there's a question. ]

[aintyourdad]

Kid, anything I can say about myself is depressing. I'd rather figure out how to get out of here.

[ Joel raises his eyebrows. ]

You got any ideas along those lines?

[starguy]

[ Fair enough, Peter shrugs. He's a man with a mission. ]

Not really sure yet. At first, I thought there wasn't really anything keeping us on-planet besides the fact that we can't fly... but some of the people here who'd normally be able to, can't, so it's not that simple.

[ Despite everything, he's been keeping notes. ]

Wish I knew more, but it's slow going.

[aintyourdad]

[ Flying. Christ, he hasn't flown in more than twenty years. And of course, never on a fucking space ship. Another thing he's just... not going to deal with, for the moment.

(He also ignores the sneaky thought that Ellie would be fascinated by this guy. He's like an astronaut, after all.) ]

Way I figure, we start by doing some scouting. Figure out what the perimeters are, how far they'll let us go, if there's any other communities we can make contact with.