[He has zero guilt about it too!! Scott laughs as well, shoulder bumping into Ryoji's despite the tension in the air, like he's trying his hardest to ignore that inevitable feeling... the feeling of how nothing can last forever. It's not really something he's felt a lot until recently, until he actually found a place he wanted to be with plenty of friends everywhere, but he doesn't like it. Why shouldn't it last forever? His friends and him living normal peaceful lives...
But he tries to focus on what Ryoji is saying to him, how he is obviously trying to tease him about having a crush and heh.]
You're kind of late on that one man. I'm already dating the cutest girl at this school. Maybe you heard of her? Kotone Shiomi.
[And it's a realization that gets Scott's heart to sink because this entire time, the warm atmosphere with other students and teachers milling about was just fake? Some stupid illusion designed to keep them here? It'd make sense, especially if Levi doesn't even remember coming here in the first place and how every inconsistency is actually starting to make sense.
He's not back with the other mutants, he's not introducing his friends to a place where they can be happy. It's just... an illusion. A dream. And yes, he still wants to find Kotone. He wonders what sort of area she's trapped in and he has to help her.]
I think we're still in Aldrip. [...] I'm sure of it.
[Sometimes it feels so difficult, holding onto this belief, when he's constantly with people that have long passed away back home. It's like a constant reminder that he can't save them, but he still wants to believe in something for them. Kotone and him promised to live each day to the fullest and he tries so hard to do that, but sometimes he really hopes for more. He wants her to actually live, get a second chance somehow.
And not just her, but Charles and Ange and everyone else. It was so nice thinking that he actually achieved such a dream, only for it to be just an illusion born from dreams. It feels worse than those Shadows or anything else he faced so far.
As his glasses continue to dig into his face, Scott reaches for them before roughly tugging them off, eyes still closed out of a natural instinct. Maybe it would be safe to open them, but he keeps his face completely buried against Altius anyway. Part of him just really wants this, for an adult telling him that it will all work out somehow.]
[So many things do, Zekarion thinks. Externally, he acknowledges the boy's pain with a soft sigh. He shifts slightly to allow Scott to take off his sunglasses without trouble, and then when the hopeful question is posed:]
Of course I will.
[He says it with sincerity. It may not be true when it comes down to it at the end, of course. Nevertheless, they're going to need so much before they can break through whatever's keeping them in this place, and he's sure if there is a path to the world Scott is looking for, it will be in the same direction in the meantime.]
Even if I might not feel the way you do... You and so many others have built your lives together here. You deserve to be able to enjoy that.
[It's a simple cost-benefit analysis, in the end; a weighing of priorities. And it feels unjust, in a way, that the cost is measured like this, in lives lost, in futures cut short. But whose future can they all bear to lose? There's always a risk. When you fight for what's right-- there's always a risk.
He fights anyway.
For a moment, the terror his dream-self feels seems insignificant; the silhouette overhead lacks the menace of a goddess, its talons less cruel than a hellish curse. I've faced worse than this, and even though Izanagi's presence is muted within him thanks to the logic of the dream, he still feels the Persona's constant companionship. The bonds that that companionship represents. If he's going to face this...at least he doesn't face it alone.]
It's alright. But you should go, [he tosses the words at Ethlyn with little weight to them, as if he's just saying see you later to a friend.] You can't die here.
[He watches the woman and her child just for a moment before the shadow reaches its biggest. Then, he looks up, spear held in his hands, at the wyvern bringing death on its wings.]
[Relief mirrored between them; Yu's expression tugs upward at the question. He's fully unhurt -- Kikuri-Hime ensures his safety in the flames, and now that they're starting to subside, so is the sting in his throat from the accompanying smoke. He nods, squeezing Tsuna's hand.]
I'm good. Are you? What was that...?
[The flames? The strange, protective presence? He leaves that question open-ended enough that hopefully Tsuna will find something comfortable to respond with.]
[It's jarring, in a way, how unexpected the room is. Somehow, stupidly, he expected a futon instead of a western-style bed. A desk, maybe. Something just feels...off. The feeling only lasts a moment -- Yu knows better than to go into a situation with assumptions like that. Still, somehow it feels...wrong.
He brushes the feeling aside.]
The mall, [he repeats, incredulous and maybe a little curious. Stupidly, the first thing he thinks --another assumption-- is a department store. A food court on the roof. Then, stupidly, he allows himself another small smile. Another small break in what should be a very steady wall.] Do you give every newcomer this warm a welcome?
[He's on the verge of a nod, of a chuckle in response: didn't you ask me that last time? You must like high places. But the logic doesn't hold, and the response fizzles before he can voice it, leaving him puzzled and confused. This feeling of familiarity -- he can't place it, and while much of his mind tries to make it work out, there is a part of him so reluctant to figure it out, so desperate, that it holds him back.]
I don't think I have, [he finally settles on, though the words feel so familiar that he doubts them all the same.
Where does this feeling come from? (Why won't it leave him alone?) He takes a breath, shakier than he'd like for it to be.] I'm up for trying it. Got any tips?
[ does he? for some reason, he doesn't think so — not with scott, specifically, but here, meeting his brother, in this mansion... alive? the thought shocks him enough that he startles when scott grabs his arm, like for a moment he expects not to feel it, or for the touch not to connect at all —
he wants to be here, too, he thinks, and there's a pain in that thought, the kind of long-since dulled pain of a hurt that one is used to, and yet it's never quite faded away; he knows he doesn't belong here, will never belong here, and though he can't explain why, there's a deep-seated feeling of unfairness there, steady and insistent.
slowly, he places his hand on scott's, there on his arm.
(for some reason, his clothes are all wet, now.) ]
... It's not about that, though, is it? Scott, you've got to — [ with a look at alex, charles' eyes grow wider, worried. ] Let go. Go to your brother. I'm... [ quietly, he summons up a smile, surprised at how easy it is, like he's done it a thousand times before. ] I'll be fine.
[Aether pauses at that, the familiarity of this situation striking him hard. This time it's like they've had this exact same conversation before, but in a much different place. Somewhere... somewhere that is not this world.
He turns to Yu, giving him a puzzled look while still holding his hand at the same time.]
...Why does it feel like we've met before?
[He doesn't know if the other will give him an answer, but he needs to try.
Next to him Lumine gives him an unhappy look, before attempting to pull him away by the hand, but he ignores her. He has to get some kind of answer first.]
We can be a family without her...! And if that woman is as a lowlife good for nothin' like mine, then we don't need her.
[ it's a slightly risky move, but rogue curls her arms around her younger sibling as the two take flight — not high, but enough that her voice can be heard clearly throughout the booming. ]
I'm tellin' ya, Kurt, she ain't real. And even if she is, she only cared about herself and my powers. Nothin' else! — Mystique is always savin' her own skin, and every time you let her in with her damn,"Sorry"s, she'll knock the wind right back outta ya.
[Thoughts, questions -- Yu barely even knows where to start. His eyes shift left, then right, taking in the faces of warriors, their pride, their strength. Their sniggering disdain for this chance at peace. A country that prays for war as a farmer prays for rain.
Yu's eyes are locked on the would-be peacemaker, only moving away the moment Khalid's gaze finds him. He's looking for help. Support. It's unmistakable, and no one's buying in.
Left. Right. The warriors stand like statues, waiting for battle.
That's it. The moment. Yu steps forward to stand beside the other man.]
[Those are very big questions. Questions he doesn't quite have answers for just yet. Mostly he just wants to get through high school. But maybe there is some truth to these words. He does tend to dither about his own opinion and conviction is something he's struggled with in the past.
It usually takes someone backing him into a corner.]
I don't think those are words that anyone's used to describe me....except for when the dying will mode's happening.
[For the first time ever, Kurt actually gets to hug her. It feels so warm and soft. Like how he'd imagined it would be like - just like he'd always dreamed.]
That- that would be great. It's what I always wanted. Just for us all to... to get a long.
[Flashes in his mind occur. For a moment, she seems to be made of stone before returning to her current appearance. He winces, but he doesn't let go. Still, he finds himself looking towards Scott for the moment, from the hug.]
Not this kinda of battle! This- this isn't some fight to the finish! This is just about stopping people from doing bad things. They have to live, so they can learn! And because killing is, it's just plain wrong!
[At first, he struggles a bit within her grasp. He looks past her, at the crumbling stone statue of Mystique.]
I- I know! I know all that! But that's why I wanted to help her! To not be like her - to be better! ...I guess I also hoped it would help her to become better. Like, like Scott's version of her. She... she can be anyone... but she chose to be that.
[He closes his eyes for a moment, letting loose from tears. Deflating briefly, he then stops his struggle and wraps his arms around Mystique.]
A-and... This already happened. It ended, she's gone. That's... what's real. And I still... I still have you, right...?
[ Playing a benign trick on someone is actually fun for her, and not at all a hardship. Toph instantly drops the act once Sigurd is out of sight, her posture going from upright and proper to her usual careless slump. She casually folds her arms in a very un-lady-like gesture. ]
What I know about brothers is that sometimes they need babysitting.
[ Ethlyn really does remind her of Katara, and as much as Toph likes Sokka, he needs a certain amount of supervision. The other brother she knows is Zuko, which... enough said. ]
[Scott breathes out a small sigh, maybe he should be glad he's even gotten this far with Hiei. Is this why people drink?? He understands now.]
More than just a friend I guess.
[He's running out of ways to define Hiei and Kurama's relationship and maybe they really don't have feelings or just too stubborn to think about it. So, going with a broad and vague definition might be the best idea for now. He's at least certain that Kurama is important to Hiei that's more than just friendship, even if that alone is something that the demon can't admit about Yusuke or others.
Scott's not exactly tired, but a lot of that teasing energy is gone from before.]
[This should be a simple concept but it's obvious Levi doesn't get it. Aside from sparring in training, he's never been in and instance where he wasn't fighting for his life.]
But I-i don't think I've done...I thought there was a war?
[Haha, oh, look at them go-- Octavian doesn't laugh outright at his startled tentacle spouting, but he does smirk a bit. Oh, that's kind of adorable. Just look at him, like an excitable little mouse.
It also seems like they have a mind of their own, almost, but he has them mostly under control? Octavian leans out from the machine to watch with interest, fascinated by the movement of these extra appendages. The work he could get done if he had a nebulous number of extra hands, imagine it...
When the wrench comes up he watches them sway for a moment before reaching out with his palm up, to accept the bounty.]
He wore it for years. Until the gears broke. We bought him a new one.
[They could have repaired it, but they were young men with income of their own and they felt like they had something to say by spending their own money on their father. The second time around the engraving was much neater.
He finds the tweezers and pulls the unfinished piece over, to start bending and connecting different parts.]
Only shapes and shadows. It was not one of those... story-telling types.
[He's not that interested in making those, but even so, this was a fun thing to fiddle with in his idle moments, not a real project.]
[He's going, he's skittering, behind a more solid piece of this collapsing place that's big enough to conceal him. As much as he can actually hide, considering the thing he's up against. It's the spirit of the thing (hah).
He still has to raise his voice, which is terrible. It's scratchy; he hasn't actually yelled in many years.]
The truth! You are asleep in your bed and your childish fantasies are only that! Useless!
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expiationlogs2025-01-13 12:39 pm
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