...yeah. Yeah, he did. Zaffy was in the stables just outside, so I told him to grab her and get the hell out of there.
[ If it had all happened outdoors, the ending would have been a very, very different story. Miller's bullets wouldn't have done nearly as much damage to Zafeera's hide, and one well-placed bite from her mighty jaws would have been more than enough to ensure that Miller had died rather than the other way around. Claude is not so altruistic that he doesn't wish that were the case - even if it hadn't been Miller's fault, better him than Claude - but the good part about dying is that you can keep your lips fully sealed and play the willing martyr instead of the curmudgeon who's willing to do whatever it takes to survive.
It's not a view others seem to share. Others - Jim aside, though he won't voice his appreciation for this perspective aloud - seem to see death and their subsequent rebirth as being no big deal, simply a fact of life in a place such as this, and certainly nothing anyone else should linger on. Claude is well-practiced in the art of managing others' expectations. He's been fighting against accusations of weakness his entire life, and knows better than to show weakness now. That doesn't mean he doesn't still feel that sting, though, that comes with the knowledge that acknowledging how monumental this felt to him will do nothing but prove a certain frailty of his spirit, some lack of resilience in his resolve, that something so many here have gone through having any impact on him would make him somehow lesser.
So he shoves it down, even here, accompanied by a sympathetic ear. It's the only thing he can do. His image is everything to him, even if he's sitting alone in an empty room; once he tears down that artifice, he's not sure what would be left. ]
I don't have the luxury of death back home. But here... well, I suppose it matters less here. [ He flashes a grin at Jim. Back home, he probably wouldn't have taken the same actions. But dying here? Even without being brought back to life? His impact on this place is small, at the end of the day. It would sadden certain individuals, but the course of history would keep marching on. It's how most people feel about death, he supposes, though he's not sure he can say the same for the good Captain before him. Jim knows a thing or two about his position being larger than himself, he'd reckon. ]
If you ask around, you'll find out that several people here have died at least once. To monsters, to some madness that overtook them all, to each other... but very rarely do people stay dead here. Even so, I wasn't about to take that chance with the kid. He doesn't even know what happened, afterwards.
THE TEMPORARY THING WAS MY OWN TYPO LOL I meant permanent.... shoves that away
[ If it had all happened outdoors, the ending would have been a very, very different story. Miller's bullets wouldn't have done nearly as much damage to Zafeera's hide, and one well-placed bite from her mighty jaws would have been more than enough to ensure that Miller had died rather than the other way around. Claude is not so altruistic that he doesn't wish that were the case - even if it hadn't been Miller's fault, better him than Claude - but the good part about dying is that you can keep your lips fully sealed and play the willing martyr instead of the curmudgeon who's willing to do whatever it takes to survive.
It's not a view others seem to share. Others - Jim aside, though he won't voice his appreciation for this perspective aloud - seem to see death and their subsequent rebirth as being no big deal, simply a fact of life in a place such as this, and certainly nothing anyone else should linger on. Claude is well-practiced in the art of managing others' expectations. He's been fighting against accusations of weakness his entire life, and knows better than to show weakness now. That doesn't mean he doesn't still feel that sting, though, that comes with the knowledge that acknowledging how monumental this felt to him will do nothing but prove a certain frailty of his spirit, some lack of resilience in his resolve, that something so many here have gone through having any impact on him would make him somehow lesser.
So he shoves it down, even here, accompanied by a sympathetic ear. It's the only thing he can do. His image is everything to him, even if he's sitting alone in an empty room; once he tears down that artifice, he's not sure what would be left. ]
I don't have the luxury of death back home. But here... well, I suppose it matters less here. [ He flashes a grin at Jim. Back home, he probably wouldn't have taken the same actions. But dying here? Even without being brought back to life? His impact on this place is small, at the end of the day. It would sadden certain individuals, but the course of history would keep marching on. It's how most people feel about death, he supposes, though he's not sure he can say the same for the good Captain before him. Jim knows a thing or two about his position being larger than himself, he'd reckon. ]
If you ask around, you'll find out that several people here have died at least once. To monsters, to some madness that overtook them all, to each other... but very rarely do people stay dead here. Even so, I wasn't about to take that chance with the kid. He doesn't even know what happened, afterwards.
[ Claude taps the side of his nose. ]
And I'd appreciate it if it stayed that way.